John Marston

The Malcontent


Source text for this digital edition:
Marston, John. The Malcontent. Edited by Martin Wine. London: Edward Arnold, 1965. Regents Renaissance Drama Series.
Digital text editor for EMOTHE:
  • Teruel Pozas, Miguel (Artelope)
  • Perelló Pigazos, Sonia (Artelope)

Note on this digital edition

Reproduced by kind permission of University of Nebraska Press. Copyright 1965 University of Nebraska Press.

THE MALCONTENT

BENIAMINO IONSONIO, POETAE ELEGANTISSIMO, GRAVISSIMO,
AMICO SVO, CANDIDO ET CORDATO, IOHANNES MARTSON, MVSARVM ALVMNVS,
ASPERA HANC SUAM THALIAM D.D.

To the Reader

I am an ill orator, and I truth, use to indite more
honestly than eloquently; for it is my custom to speak as
I think, and write as I speak.
In plainness, therefore, understand that in some things
I have willingly erred, as in supposing a Duke of Genoa
and in taking names different from that city's families:
for which some may wittily accuse me , but my defense
shall be as honest, as many reproofs unto me have been
most malicious since, I heartily protest, it was my care to
write so far from reasonable offense that even strangers
in whose state I laid my scene should not from thence draw
any disgrace to any, dead or living. Yet, in despite of my
endeavors, I understand some have been most unadvisedly
overcunning in misinterpreting me, and with subtlety as
deep as hell have maliciously spread ill rumors, which,
springing from themselves, might to themselves have
heavily returned. Surely I desire to satisfy every firm
spirit, who, in all his actions, proposeth to himself no more
ends than God and virtue do, whose intentions are always
simple: to such I protest that, with my free understanding,
I have not glanced at disgrace of any but of those whose
unquiet studies labor innovation, contempt of holy policy,
reverent, comely superiority, and establish'd unity. For
the rest of my supposed tartness, I fear not but unto every
worthy mind it will be approved so general and honest as
may modestly pass with the freedom of a satire. I would
fain leave the paper; only one thing afflicts me, to think
that scenes invented merely to be spoken should be enfor-
cively published to be read, and that the least hurt I can
receive is to do myself the wrong. But, since others otherwise
would do me more, the least inconvenience is to be ac-
cepted. I have myself, therefore, set forth this comedy,
but so that my enforced absence must much rely upon
the printer's discretion; but I shall entreat slight errors in
orthography may be as slightly overpassed and that the
unhandsome shape which this trifle in reading presents may
be pardoned for the pleasure it once afforded you when it
was presented with the soul of lively action.
Sine aliqua dementia nullus Phoebus.
I. M.

Dramatis personae

GIOVANNI ALTOFRONTO disguised as MALEVOLE, sometime Duke of Genoa
PIETRO JACOMO Duke of Genoa
MENDOZA a minion to the Duchess of Pietro Jacomo
CELSO a friend to Altofronto
BILIOSO an old choleric marshal
PREPASSO a gentleman usher
FERNEZE a young courtier, and enamored on the Duchess
FERRARDO a minion to Duke Pietro Jacomo
EQUATO }
GUERRINO } two courtiers
AURELIA Duchess to Duke Pietro Jacomo
MARIA Duchess to Duke Altofront
EMILIA }
BIANCHA } two ladies attending the Duchess [Aurelia]
MAQUERELLE an old pand'ress
PASSARELLO fool to Bilioso
CAPTAIN guarding the Citadel
MERCURY in the Masque
PAGES
GUARDS
WILLIAM SLY }
JOHN SINKLO }
RICHARD BURBAGE }
HENRY CONDELL }
JOHN LOWIN }
A TIREMAN } Members of the Company of His Majesty's Servants in the Induction]

THE INDUCTION TO THE MALCONTENT

And the Additions Acted by the King's Majesty's Servants
Written by John Webster
Enter Will Sly, a Tireman following him with a stool

TIREMAN.
1Sir, the gentlemen will be angry if you sit here.

SLY.
2Why? We may sit upon the stage at the private house. 3Thou dost not take me for a country gentleman, dost? 4Dost think I fear hissing? I'll hold my life thou took'st me 5for one of the players.

TIREMAN.
6No, sir.

SLY.
7By God's slid, if you had, I would have given you but 8sixpence for your stool. Let them that have stale suits sit 9in the galleries. Hiss at me! He that will be laugh'd out 10of a tavern or an ordinary shall seldom feed well or be 11drunk in good company. ─Where's Harry Condell, Dick 12Burbage, and Will Sly? Let me speak with some of them.

TIREMAN.
13An't please you to go in, sir, you may.

SLY.
14I tell you, no. I am one that hath seen this play often, and 15can give them intelligence for their action. I have most of 16the jests here in my table-book.

Enter Sinklo.

SINKLO.
17Save you, coz!

SLY.
18O, cousin, come, you shall sit between my legs here.

SINKLO.
19No, indeed, cousin; the audience then will take me for a 20viol-de-gamba, and think that you play upon me.

SLY.
21Nay, rather that I work upon you, coz.

SINKLO.
22We stayed for you at supper last night at my cousin 23Honeymoon's, the woolen draper. After supper we drew 24cuts for a score of apricocks, the longest cut still to draw an 25apricock. By this light, 'twas Mistress Frank Honeymoon's 26fortune still to have the longest cut; I did measure for the 27women. ─What be these, coz?

Enter Dick Burbage, Harry Condell, John Lowin.

SLY.
28The players. ─ God save you!

BURBAGE.
29You are very welcome.

SLY.
30I pray you, know this gentleman, my cousin; 'tis Master 31Doomsday's son, the usurer.

CONDELL.
32I beseech you, sir, be covered.

SLY.
33Not, in good faith, for mine ease. Look you, my hat's the 34handle to this fan. God's so, what a beast was I, I did not 35leave my feather at home. Well, but I'll take an order with 36you.

Puts his feather in his pocket.

BURBAGE.
37Why do you conceal your feather, sir?

SLY.
38Why? Do you think I'll have jests broken upon me in the 39play, to be laugh'd at? This play hath beaten all your 40gallants out of the feathers: Blackfriars hath almost spoil'd 41Blackfriars for feathers.

SINKLO.
42God's so, I thought 'twas for somewhat our gentlewomen at 43home counsel'd me to wear my feather to the play; yet I am 44loath to spoil it.

SLY.
45Why, coz?

SINKLO.
46Because I got it in the tiltyard. There was a herald broke 47my pate for taking it up; but I have worn it up and down 48the Strand, and met him forty times since, and yet he dares 49not challenge it.

SLY.
50Do you hear, sir? This play is a bitter play.

CONDELL.
51Why, sir, 'tis neither satire nor moral, but the mean passage 52of a history; yet there are a sort of discontented creatures 53that bear a stingless envy to great ones, and these will 54wrest the doings of any man to their base, malicious apply- 55ment. But should their interpretation come to the test, like 56your marmoset they presently turn their teeth to their 57tail and eat it.

SLY.
58I will not go so far with you; but I say, any man that hath 59wit may censure if he sit in the twelvepenny room; and 60I say again, the play is bitter.

BURBAGE.
61Sir, you are like a patron that, presenting a poor scholar 62to a benefice, enjoins him not to rail against anything that 63stands within compass of his patron's folly. Why should not 64we enjoy the ancient freedom of poesy? Shall we protest 65to the ladies that their painting makes them angels? or to 66my young gallant, that his expense in the brothel shall gain 67him reputation? No, sir, such vices as stand not accountable 68to law should be cured as men heal tetters, by casting ink 69upon them. Would you be satisfied in anything else, sir ?

SLY.
70Ay, marry, would I: I would know how you came by 71this play?

CONDELL.
72Faith, sir, the book was lost; and, because 'twas pity so 73good a play should be lost, we found it and play it.

SLY.
74I wonder you would play it, another company having 75interest in it.

CONDELL.
76Why not Malevole in folio with us, as Jeronimo in decimo- 77sexto with them? They taught us a name for our play; we 78call it, One for another.

SLY.
79What are your additions ?

BURBAGE.
80Sooth, not greatly needful: only as your sallet to your 81great feast, to entertain a little more time, and to abridge 82the not-received custom of music in our theater. I must 83leave you, sir.

Exit Burbage

SINKLO.
84Doth he play the Malcontent?

CONDELL.
85Yes, sir.

SINKLO.
86I durst lay four of mine ears the play is not so well acted 87as it hath been.

CONDELL.
88O, no, sir, nothing, ad Parmenonis suem.

LOWIN.
89Have you lost your ears, sir, that you are so prodigal of 90laying them?

SINKLO.
91Why did you ask that, friend?

LOWIN.
92Marry, sir, because I have heard of a fellow would offer to 93lay a hundred pound wager that was not worth five baubees; 94and in this kind you might venture four of your elbows. 95Yet God defend your coat should have so many!

SINKLO.
96Nay, truly, I am no great censurer; and yet I might have 97been one of the College of Critics once. My cousin here 98hath an excellent memory, indeed, sir.

SLY.
99Who? I? I'll tell you a strange thing of myself; and I can 100tell you, for one that never studied the art of memory, 'tis 101very strange too.

CONDELL.
102What's that, sir?

SLY.
103Why, I 'll lay a hundred pound I 'll walk but once down 104by the Goldsmiths' Row in Cheap, take notice of the signs, 105and tell you them with a breath instantly.

LOWIN.
106'Tis very strange.

SLY.
107They begin as the world did, with Adam and Eve. There 's 108in all just five and fifty. I do use to meditate much when I 109come to plays too. What do you think might come into 110a man's head now, seeing all this company?

CONDELL.
111I know not, sir.

SLY.
112I have an excellent thought: if some fifty of the Grecians 113that were cramm'd in the horse-belly had eaten garlic, 114do you not think the Trojans might have smelt out their 115knavery?

CONDELL.
116Very likely.

SLY.
117By God, I would they had, for I love Hector horribly.

SINKLO.
118O, but coz, coz!─ 119"Great Alexander, when he came to the tomb of Achilles, 120Spake with a big loud voice, 'O thou thrice blessed and 121happy!"

SLY.
122Alexander was an ass to speak so well of a filthy cullion.

LOWIN.
123Good sir, will you leave the stage? I'll help you to a 124private room.

SLY.
125Come, coz, let's take some tobacco. ─Have you never a 126prologue ?

LOWIN.
127Not any, sir.

SLY.
128Let me see, I will make one extempore. Come to them and, 129fencing of a congee with arms and legs, be round with 130them: 131Gentlemen, I could wish for the women's sakes you 132had all soft cushions; and, gentlewomen, I could wish 133that for the men's sakes you had all more easy standings. 134What would they wish more but the play now? And that 135they shall have instantly.

[Exeunt.]

The Malcontent

Vexat censura columbas.
An Imperfect Ode, Being But One Staff, Spoken by the

PROLOGUE
136
To wrest each hurtles thought to private sense
137
Is the foul use of ill-bred Impudence:
138
Immodest censure now grows wild,
139
All overrunning.
140
Let Innocence be ne'er so chaste,
141
Yet at the last
142
She is defil'd
143
With too nice-brained cunning.
144
O you of fairer soul,
145
Control
146
With an Herculean arm
147
This harm;
148
And once teach all old freedom of a pen,
149
Which still must write of fools, whiles't writes of men!

[I.i]

The vilest out-of-tune music being heard, enter Bilioso and Prepasso.

BILIOSO.
150Why, how now! Are ye mad, or drunk, or both, or what?

PREPASSO.
151Are ye building Babylon there?

BILIOSO.
152Here's a noise in court! You think you are in a tavern, do 153you not?

PREPASSO.
154You think you are in a brothel house, do you not? ─This 155room is ill-scented. Enter One with a perfume. 156So, perfume, perfume; some upon me, I pray thee. ─ The 157Duke is upon instant entrance; so, make place there!

[I.ii]

Enter the Duke Pietro, Ferrardo, Count Equato, Count Celso before, and Guerrino.

PIETRO.
1Where breathes that music?

BILIOSO.
2The discord rather than the music is heard from the 3malcontent Malevole's chamber.

FERRARDO.
4 [calling] Malevole!

MALEVOLE.
5 (out of his chamber) Yaugh, God o' man, what dost thou there? Duke's Gany- 6mede, Juno's jealous of thy long stockings. Shadow of a 7woman, what wouldst, weasel? Thou lamb o' court, what 8dost thou bleat for? Ah, you smooth-chinn'd catamite!

PIETRO.
9Come down, thou ragged cur, and snarl here. I give thy 10dogged sullenness free liberty; trot about and bespurtle 11whom thou pleasest.

MALEVOLE.
12I'll come among you, you goatish-blooded toderers, as 13gum into taffeta, to fret, to fret. I'll fall like a sponge into 14water to suck up, to suck up. Howl again! I'll go to church 15and come to you.

Exit above.

PIETRO.
16This Malevole is one of the most prodigious affections that 17ever convers'd with nature: a man, or rather a monster, 18more discontent than Lucifer when he was thrust out of the 19presence. His appetite is unsatiable as the grave, as far from 20any content as from heaven. His highest delight is to procure 21others' vexation, and therein he thinks he truly serves 22heaven; for 'tis his position, whosoever in this earth can be 23contented, is a slave and damn'd; therefore does he afflict 24all in that to which they are most affected. Th' elements 25struggle within him; his own soul is at variance within her- 26self; his speech is halter-worthy at all hours. I like him; 27faith, he gives good intelligence to my spirit, makes me 28understand those weaknesses which others' flattery palliates. 29Hark! they sing.

[Song.]

[I.iii]

Enter Malevole after the song.

PIETRO.
1See, he comes. Now shall you hear the extremity of a 2malcontent: he is as free as air; he blows over every man. 3─And, sir, whence come you now ?

MALEVOLE.
4From the public place of much dissimulation, the church.

PIETRO.
5What didst there?

MALEVOLE.
6Talk with a usurer; take up at interest.

PIETRO.
7I wonder what religion thou art of.

MALEVOLE.
8Of a soldier's religion.

PIETRO.
9And what dost think makes most infidels now?

MALEVOLE.
10Sects, sects. I have seen seeming Piety change her robe so 11oft that sure none but some arch-devil can shape her a new 12petticoat.

PIETRO.
13O, a religious policy.

MALEVOLE.
14But damnation on a politic religion! I am weary. Would 15I were one of the Duke's hounds now.

PIETRO.
16But what's the common news abroad, Malevole? Thou 17dogg'st rumour still.

MALEVOLE.
18Common news? Why, common words are, "God save ye," 19"Fare ye well"; common actions, flattery, and cozenage; 20common things, women, and cuckolds. ─And how does my 21little Ferrard? Ah, ye lecherous animal! ─my little ferret, 22he goes sucking up and down the palace into every hen's 23nest, like a weasel ─ and to what dost thou addict thy 24time to now more than to those antique painted drabs that 25are still affected of young courtiers, Flattery, Pride, and 26Venery?

FERRARDO.
27I study languages. Who dost think to be the best linguist 28of our age?

MALEVOLE.
29Phew, the devil. Let him possess thee; he'll teach thee to 30speak all languages most readily and strangely; and great 31reason, marry, he's travel'd greatly in the world and is 32everywhere.

FERRARDO.
33Save i' th' court.

MALEVOLE.
34Ay, save i' th' court. ─ (To Bilioso.) And how dost my 35old muckhill, overspread with fresh snow? Thou half a man, 36half a goat, all a beast! How does thy young wife, old 37huddle?

BILIOSO.
38Out, you improvident rascal!

MALEVOLE.
39Do, kick, thou hugely-horn'd old duke's ox, good Master 40Make-please.

PIETRO.
41How dost thou live nowadays, Malevole?

MALEVOLE.
42Why, like the knight, Sir Patrick Penlolians, with killing 43o' spiders for my lady's monkey.

PIETRO.
44How dost spend the night? I hear thou never sleep'st.

MALEVOLE.
45O, no, but dream the most fantastical! O heaven! O 46fubbery, fubbery!

PIETRO.
47Dream! What dream'st?

MALEVOLE.
48Why, methinks I see that signior pawn his footcloth, that 49metreza her plate; this madam takes physic, that t'other 50monsieur may minister to her. Here is a pander jewel'd; there 51is a fellow in shift of satin this day that could not shift a 52shirt t'other night. Here a Paris supports that Helen; 53there's a lady Guinevere bears up that Sir Lancelot. 54Dreams, dreams, visions, fantasies, chimeras, imaginations, 55tricks, conceits! ─ (To Prepasso.) Sir Tristram Trimtram, 56come aloft, Jackanapes with a whim-wham. Here's a 57knight of the land of Catito shall play at trap with any page 58in Europe, do the sword dance with any morris dancer in 59Christendom, ride at the ring, till the fin of his eyes look 60as blue as the welkin, and run the wild-goose chase even 61with Pompey the Huge.

PIETRO.
62You run!

MALEVOLE.
63To the devil. ─ Now, Signior Guerrino, that thou from a 64most pitied prisoner shouldst grow a most loath'd flatterer! 65─Alas! poor Celso, thy star's oppress'd: thou art an honest 66lord. 'Tis pity.

EQUATO.
67Is't pity?

MALEVOLE.
68Ay, marry, is't, philosophical Equato; and 'tis pity that 69thou, being so excellent a scholar by art, shouldst be so 70ridiculous a fool by nature. ─I have a thing to tell you, 71duke; bid 'em avaunt, bid 'em avaunt.

PIETRO.
72Leave us, leave us. Exeunt all saving Pietro and Malevole. 73Now, sir, what is't?

MALEVOLE.
74Duke, thou art a becco, a cornuto.

PIETRO.
75How?

MALEVOLE.
76Thou art a cuckold.

PIETRO.
77Speak; unshale him quick.

MALEVOLE.
78With most tumbler-like nimbleness.

PIETRO.
79Who? By whom? I burst with desire.

MALEVOLE.
80Mendoza is the man makes thee a horn'd beast; duke, 'tis 81Mendoza cornutes thee.

PIETRO.
82What conformance? Relate; short, short!

MALEVOLE.
83As a lawyer's beard. 84There is an old crone in the court ─ her name is Maquerelle; 85She is my mistress, sooth to say, and she doth ever tell me. 86Blurt o' rhyme, blurt o' rhyme! Maquerelle is a cunning 87bawd; I am an honest villain; thy wife is a close drab; and 88thou art a notorious cuckold. Farewell, duke.

PIETRO.
89Stay, stay.

MALEVOLE.
90Dull, dull duke, can lazy patience make lame revenge? O 91God, for a woman to make a man that which God never 92created, never made!

PIETRO.
93What did God never make?

MALEVOLE.
94A cuckold! To be made a thing that's hoodwink'd with 95kindness whilst every rascal fillips his brows; to have a cox- 96comb with egregious horns pinn'd to a lord's back, every 97page sporting himself with delightful laughter, whilst he 98must be the last must know it. Pistols and poniards! 99Pistols and poniards!

PIETRO.
100Death and damnation!

MALEVOLE.
101Lightning and thunder!

PIETRO.
102Vengeance and torture!

MALEVOLE.
103Catzo!

PIETRO.
104O, revenge!

MALEVOLE.
105
Nay, to select among ten thousand fairs
106
A lady far inferior to the most.
107
In fair proportion both of limb and soul;
108
To take her from austerer check of parents,
109
To make her his by most devoutful rites,
110
Make her commandress of a better essence
111
Than is the gorgeous world, even of a man;
112
To hug her with as rais'd an appetite
113
As usurers do their delv'd-up treasury
114
(Thinking none tells it but his private self);
115
To meet her spirit in a nimble kiss,
116
Distilling panting ardour to her heart;
117
True to her sheets, nay, diets strong his blood,
118
To give her height of hymeneal sweets ─

PIETRO.
119O God!

MALEVOLE.
120
Whilst she lisps and gives him some court quelquechose,
121
Made only to provoke, not satiate:
122
And yet, even then, the thaw of her delight
123
Flows from lewd heat of apprehension,
124
Only from strange imagination's rankness,
125
That forms the adulterer's presence in her soul,
126
And makes her think she clips the foul knave's loins.

PIETRO.
127Affliction to my blood's root!

MALEVOLE.
128
Nay, think, but think what may proceed of this;
129
Adultery is often the mother of incest.

PIETRO.
130Incest!

MALEVOLE.
131Yes, incest. Mark! Mendoza of his wife begets perchance a 132daughter; Mendoza dies; his son marries this daughter. Say 133you? Nay, 'tis frequent, not only probable, but no question 134often acted whilst ignorance, fearless ignorance, clasps his 135own seed.

PIETRO.
136Hideous imagination!

MALEVOLE.
137Adultery! Why, next to the sin of simony, 'tis the most horrid 138transgression under the cope of salvation.

PIETRO.
139Next to simony?

MALEVOLE.
140Ay, next to simony, in which our men in next age shall not 141sin.

PIETRO.
142Not sin? Why?

MALEVOLE.
143Because (thanks to some churchmen) our age will leave 144them nothing to sin with. But adultery ─O dullness! ─ 145should show exemplary punishment, that intemperate 146bloods may freeze but to think it. I would dam him and all 147his generation; my own hands should do it ─ ha, I would 148not trust heaven with my vengeance anything.

PIETRO.
149Anything, anything, Malevole! Thou shalt see instantly 150what temper my spirit holds. Farewell; remember I forget 151thee not; farewell.

Exit Pietro.

MALEVOLE.
152Farewell.
153
Lean thoughtfulness, a sallow meditation,
154
Suck thy veins dry! Distemperance rob thy sleep!
155
The heart's disquiet is revenge most deep:
156
He that gets blood, the life of flesh but spills,
157
But he that breaks heart's peace, the dear soul kills. ─
158
Well, this disguise doth yet afford me that
159
Which kings do seldom hear, or great men use ─
160
Free speech; and though my state's usurp'd,
161
Yet this affected strain gives me a tongue
162
As fetterless as is an emperor's.
163
I may speak foolishly, ay, knavishly,
164
Always carelessly, yet no one thinks it fashion
165
To poise my breath; for he that laughs and strikes
166
Is lightly felt, or seldom struck again.
167
Duke, I'll torment thee: now my just revenge
168
From thee than crown a richer gem shall part.
169
Beneath God naught's so dear as a calm heart.

[I.iv]

Enter Celso.

CELSO.
1
My honor'd lord ─

MALEVOLE.
2
Peace, speak low; peace! O Celso, constant lord,
3
Thou to whose faith I only rest discovered,
4
Thou, one of full ten millions of men,
5
That lovest virtue only for itself,
6
Thou in whose hands old Ops may put her soul,
7
Behold forever-banish'd Altofront,
8
This Genoa's last year's duke. O truly noble!
9
I wanted those old instruments of state,
10
Dissemblance and suspect. I could not time it, Celso;
11
My throne stood like a point in middest of a circle,
12
To all of equal nearness; bore with none;
13
Reign'd all alike; so slept in fearless virtue,
14
Suspectless, too suspectless; till the crowd,
15
Still lickerous of untried novelties,
16
Impatient with severer government,
17
Made strong with Florence, banish'd Altofront.

CELSO.
18
Strong with Florence! Ay, thence your mischief rose,
19
For when the daughter of the Florentine
20
Was matched once with this Pietro, now duke,
21
No stratagem of state untried was left,
22
Till you of all ─

MALEVOLE.
Of all was quite bereft.
23
Alas, Maria too, close prisoned,
24
My true-faith'd duchess, i' th' citadel!

CELSO.
25
I'll still adhere; let's mutiny and die.

MALEVOLE.
26
O, no, climb not a falling tower, Celso;
27
'Tis well held desperation, no zeal,
28
Hopeless to strive with fate. Peace! Temporize!
29
Hope, hope, that never forsak'st the wretched'st man,
30
Yet bidd'st me live and lurk in this disguise!
31
What, play I well the free-breath'd discontent?
32
Why, man, we are all philosophical monarchs
33
Or natural fools. Celso, the court's afire;
34
The duchess' sheets will smoke for't ere it be long.
35
Impure Mendoza, that sharp-nos'd lord, that made
36
The cursed match, link'd Genoa with Florence,
37
Now broad-horns the duke, which he now knows.
38
Discord to malcontents is very manna;
39
When the ranks are burst, then scuffle, Altofront.

CELSO.
40
Ay, but durst ─

MALEVOLE.
41
'Tis gone; 'tis swallow'd like a mineral.
42
Some way 'twill work. Pheut, I'll not shrink;
43
He's resolute who can no lower sink.

Bilioso entering, Malevole shifteth his speech.

MALEVOLE.
44O, the father of Maypoles! Did you never see a fellow 45whose strength consisted in his breath, respect in his office, 46religion in his lord, and love in himself? Why then, behold!

BILIOSO.
47Signior ─

MALEVOLE.
48My right worshipful lord, your court nightcap makes you 49have a passing high forehead.

BILIOSO.
50I can tell you strange news, but I am sure you know them 51already: the Duke speaks much good of you.

MALEVOLE.
52Go to, then; and shall you and I now enter into a strict 53friendship?

BILIOSO.
54Second one another?

MALEVOLE.
55Yes.

BILIOSO.
56Do one another good offices?

MALEVOLE.
57Just. What though I call'd thee old ox, egregious wittol, 58broken-bellied coward, rotten mummy? Yet, since I am in 59favor ─

BILIOSO.
60Words, of course, terms of disport. His grace presents you 61by me a chain, as his grateful remembrance for ─ I am ignor- 62ant for what; marry, ye may impart. Yet howsoever ─ come, 63dear friend. Dost know my son?

MALEVOLE.
64Your son?

BILIOSO.
65He shall eat woodcocks, dance jigs, make possets, and play 66at shuttlecock with any young lord about the court. He has 67as sweet a lady, too. Dost know her little bitch?

MALEVOLE.
68'Tis a dog, man.

BILIOSO.
69Believe me, a she-bitch. O 'tis a good creature! Thou shalt 70be her servant. I'll make thee acquainted with my young 71wife, too. What, I keep her not at court for nothing! 'Tis 72grown to supper time; come to my table ─ that, anything 73I have, stands open to thee.

MALEVOLE.
74
([aside] to Celso).
How smooth to him that is in state of grace,
75
How servile is the rugged'st courtier's face!
76
What profit, nay, what nature would keep down,
77
Are heav'd to them are minions to a crown.
78
Envious ambition never sates his thirst,
79
Till, sucking all, he swells and swells, and bursts.

BILIOSO.
80I shall now leave you with my always-best wishes; only let's 81hold betwixt us a firm correspondence, a mutual friendly- 82reciprocal kind of steady-unanimous-heartily-leagued ─

MALEVOLE.
83Did your signiorship ne'er see a pigeonhouse that was 84smooth, round, and white without, and full of holes and 85stink within? Ha' ye not, old courtier?

BILIOSO.
86O, yes, 'tis the form, the fashion of them all.

MALEVOLE.
87Adieu, my true court friend; farewell, my dear Castilio.

Exit Bilioso.

CELSO.
88
Yonder's Mendoza.

Descries Mendoza.

MALEVOLE.
True, the privy key.

CELSO.
89
I take my leave, sweet lord.

Exit Celso.

MALEVOLE.
'Tis fit; away!

[I.v]

Enter Mendoza, with three or four Suitors.

MENDOZA.
1Leave your suits with me; I can and will. Attend my 2secretary; leave me.

Exeunt Suitors.

MALEVOLE.
3Mendoza, hark ye, hark ye. You are a treacherous villain, 4God be wi' ye!

MENDOZA.
5Out, you baseborn rascal!

MALEVOLE.
6We are all the sons of heaven, though a tripe-wife were 7our mother. Ah, you whoreson, hot-rein'd he-marmoset! 8ᴁgisthus ─ didst ever hear of one ᴁgisthus?

MENDOZA.
9Gisthus?

MALEVOLE.
10Ay, ᴁgisthus; he was a filthy, incontinent fleshmonger, 11such a one as thou art.

MENDOZA.
12Out, grumbling rogue!

MALEVOLE.
13Orestes, beware Orestes!

MENDOZA.
14Out, beggar!

MALEVOLE.
15I once shall rise.

MENDOZA.
16Thou rise?

MALEVOLE.
17
Ay, at the resurrection.
18
No vulgar seed but once may rise, and shall;
19
No king so huge but 'fore he die may fall.

Exit.

MENDOZA.
20Now; good Elysium! what a delicious heaven is it for a 21man to be in a prince's favor! O sweet God! O pleasure! 22O fortune! O all thou best of life! What should I think, 23what say, what do, to be a favorite, a minion? To have a 24general timorous respect, observe a man, a stateful silence 25in his presence, solitariness in his absence, a confused hum 26and busy murmur of obsequious suitors training him; the 27cloth held up and way proclaimed before him, petitionary 28vassals licking the pavement with their slavish knees whilst 29some odd palace-lamprels that engender with snakes, and 30are full of eyes on both sides, with a kind of insinuated 31humbleness fix all their delights upon his brow! O blessed 32state! What a ravishing prospect doth the Olympus of 33favor yield! Death, I cornute the duke! Sweet women, 34most sweet ladies! nay, angels! By heaven, he is more 35accursed than a devil that hates you, or is hated by you, and 36happier than a god that loves you, or is beloved by you. 37You preservers of mankind, lifeblood of society, who 38would live, nay, who can live without you? O paradise, 39how majestical is your austerer presence! How imperiously 40chaste is your more modest face! But, O, how full of 41ravishing attraction is your pretty, petulant, languishing, 42lasciviously composed countenance! these amorous smiles, 43those soul-warming sparkling glances, ardent as those 44flames that sing'd the world by heedless Phaëthon! In 45body how delicate, in soul how witty, in discourse how 46pregnant, in life how wary, in favors how judicious, in day 47how sociable, and in night how ─ O pleasure unutterable! 48Indeed, it is most certain, one man cannot deserve only 49to enjoy a beauteous woman. But a duchess! In despite of 50Phoebus, I'll write a sonnet instantly in praise of her.

Exit.

[I.vi]

Enter Ferneze, ushering Aurelia, Emilia and Maquerelle bearing up her train, Biancha attending; all go out but Aurelia, Maquerelle, and Ferneze.

AURELIA.
1And is't possible? Mendoza slight me! Possible?

FERNEZE.
2
Possible!
3
What can be strange in him that's drunk with favour,
4
Grows insolent with grace? Speak, Maquerelle, speak.

MAQUERELLE.
5To speak feelingly, more, more richly in solid sense than 6worthless words, give me those jewels of your ears to receive 7my enforced duty. As for my part, 'tis well known I can put (Ferneze privately feeds Maquerelle's hands with jewels during this speech) up anything, 8can bear patiently with any man: 9But when I heard he wronged your precious sweetness, I was 10Enforced to take deep offense. 'Tis most certain he loves 11Emilia with high appetite; and, as she told me (as you 12know, we women impart our secrets one to another), when 13she repulsed his suit, in that he was possessed with your 14endeared grace, Mendoza most ingratefully renounced all 15faith to you.

FERNEZE.
16Nay, call'd you ─ speak, Maquerelle, speak.

MAQUERELLE.
17By heaven, "witch," "dried biscuit," and contested 18blushlessly he lov'd you but for a spurt, or so.

FERNEZE.
19For maintenance.

MAQUERELLE.
20Advancement and regard.

AURELIA.
21O villain! O impudent Mendoza!

MAQUERELLE.
22Nay, he is the rustiest-jaw'd, the foulest-mouth'd knave 23in railing against our sex; he will rail against women ─

AURELIA.
24How? how?

MAQUERELLE.
25I am asham'd to speak't, I.

AURELIA.
26I love to hate him ─ speak.

MAQUERELLE.
27Why, when Emilia scorn'd his base unsteadiness, the 28black-throated rascal scolded, and said ─

AURELIA.
29What?

MAQUERELLE.
30Troth, 'tis too shameless.

AURELIA.
31What said he?

MAQUERELLE.
32Why, that at four women were fools; at fourteen, drabs; 33at forty, bawds; at fourscore, witches; and at a hundred, 34cats.

AURELIA.
35O unlimitable impudency!

FERNEZE.
36
But, as for poor Ferneze's fixed heart,
37
Was never shadeless meadow drier parch'd
38
Under the scorching heat of heaven's dog
39
Than is my heart with your enforcing eyes.

MAQUERELLE.
40A hot simile!

FERNEZE.
41
Your smiles have been my heaven, your frowns my hell.
42
O, pity, then! Grace should with beauty dwell.

MAQUERELLE.
43Reasonable perfect, by'r Lady.

AURELIA.
44
I will love thee, be it but in despite
45
Of that Mendoza. "Witch," Ferneze, "witch"!
46
Ferneze, thou art the dutchess' favorite;
47
Be faithful, private; but 'tis dangerous.

FERNEZE.
48
His love is liveless that for love fears breath;
49
The worst that's due to sin, O, would 'twere death!

AURELIA.
50Enjoy my favor. I will be sick instantly and take physic; 51therefore, in depth of night visit ─

MAQUERELLE.
52Visit her chamber, but conditionally: You shall not offend 53her bed, by this diamond!

FERNEZE.
54By this diamond.

Gives it to Maquerelle.

MAQUERELLE.
55Nor tarry longer than you please, by this ruby!

FERNEZE.
56By this ruby.

Gives again.

MAQUERELLE.
57And that the door shall not creak.

FERNEZE.
58And that the door shall not creak.

MAQUERELLE.
59Nay, but swear.

FERNEZE.
60By this purse .

Gives her his purse.

MAQUERELLE.
61Go to, I'll keep your oaths for you. Remember, visit.

Enter Mendoza, reading a sonnet.

AURELIA.
62"Dried biscuit!" ─ Look where the base wretch comes.

MENDOZA.
63"Beauty's life, heaven's model, love's queen" ─

MAQUERELLE.
64(aside). That's his Emilia.

MENDOZA.
65"Nature's triumph, best on earth" ─

MAQUERELLE.
66(aside). Meaning Emilia.

MENDOZA.
67"Thou only wonder that the world hath seen" ─

MAQUERELLE.
68(aside). That's Emilia.

AURELIA.
69(aside). Must I then hear her prais'd? ─ Mendoza!

MENDOZA.
70Madam, your excellency is graciously encounter'd; I have 71been writing passionate flashes in honour of ─

Exit Ferneze.

AURELIA.
72Out, villain, villain! O judgment, where have been my 73eyes? What bewitched election made me dote on thee? 74What sorcery made me love thee? But, be gone; bury thy 75head. O, that I could do more than loathe thee! Hence, 76worst of ill: No reason ask; our reason is our will.

Exit with Maquerelle.

MENDOZA.
77Women! Nay, furies; nay, worse; for they torment only 78the bad, but women good and bad. Damnation of mankind! 79Breath, hast thou prais'd them for this? And is't you, 80Ferneze, are wriggled into smock-grace? Sit sure. O, that 81I could rail against these monsters in nature, models of 82hell, curse of the earth, women that dare attempt anything, 83and what they attempt they care not how they accomplish; 84without all premeditation or prevention; rash in asking, 85desperate in working, impatient in suffering, extreme in 86desiring, slaves unto appetite, mistresses in dissembling, 87only constant in unconstancy, only perfect in counterfeiting; 88their words are feigned, their eyes forged, their sights dis- 89sembled, their looks counterfeit, their hair false, their given 90hopes deceitful, their very breath artificial. Their blood is 91their only god; bad clothes and old age, are only the devils 92they tremble at. That I could rail now!

[I.vii]

Enter Pietro, his sword drawn.

PIETRO.
1
A mischief fill thy throat, thou foul-jaw'd slave!
2
Say thy prayers.

MENDOZA.
I ha' forgot 'em.

PIETRO.
Thou shalt die!

MENDOZA.
3
So shalt thou. I am heart-mad.

PIETRO.
I am horn-mad.

MENDOZA.
4
Extreme mad.

PIETRO.
Monstrously mad.

MENDOZA.
Why?

PIETRO.
5
Why? Thou, thou hast dishonored my bed.

MENDOZA.
6
I? Come, come, sit; here's my bare heart to thee,
7
As steady as is this center to the glorious world.
8
And yet, hark, thou art a cornuto─but by me?

PIETRO.
9
Yes, slave, by thee.

MENDOZA.
10
Do not, do not with tart and spleenful breath
11
Lose him can lose thee. I offend my duke?
12
Bear record, O ye dumb and raw-air'd nights,
13
How vigilant my sleepless eyes have been
14
To watch the traitor! Record, thou spirit of truth,
15
With what debasement I ha' thrown myself
16
To under offices, only to learn
17
The truth, the party, time, the means, the place,
18
By whom, and when, and where thou wert disgrac'd!
19
And am I paid with "slave"? Hath my intrusion
20
To places private and prohibited,
21
Only to observe the closer passages ─
22
Heaven knows with vows of revelation ─
23
Made me suspected, made me deem'd a villain?
24
What rogue hath wronged us?

PIETRO.
Mendoza, I may err.

MENDOZA.
25
Err? 'Tis too mild a name; but err and err,
26
Run giddy with suspect, 'fore through me thou know
27
That which most creatures, save thyself, do know
28
Nay, since my service hath so loath'd reject,
29
'Fore I'll reveal, shalt find them clipp'd together.

PIETRO.
30Mendoza, thou know'st I am a most plain-breasted man.

MENDOZA.
31The fitter to make a cuckold! Would your brows were most 32plain too!

PIETRO.
33Tell me; indeed, I heard thee rail.

MENDOZA.
34
At women, true. Why, what cold phlegm could choose,
35
Knowing a lord so honest, virtuous,
36
So boundless-loving, bounteous, fair-shap'd, sweet,
37
To be contemn'd, abus'd, defam'd, made cuckold?
38Heart! I hate all women for't: sweet sheets, wax lights, 39antique bedposts, cambric smocks, villainous curtains, 40arras pictures, oil'd hinges, and all the tongue-tied lascivious 41witnesses of great creatures' wantonness! What salvation can 42you expect?

PIETRO.
43Wilt thou tell me?

MENDOZA.
44Why, you may find it yourself; observe, observe.

PIETRO.
45I ha' not the patience. Wilt thou deserve me? Tell, give it.

MENDOZA.
46Take't;! Why, Ferneze is the man, Ferneze. I'll prove't; 47this night you shall take him in your sheets. Will't serve?

PIETRO.
48It will. My bosom's in some peace.
49
Till night ─

MENDOZA.
What?

PIETRO.
Farewell.

MENDOZA.
God! how weak a lord are you !
50
Why, do you think there is no more but so?

PIETRO.
51
Why?

MENDOZA.
Nay, then will I presume to counsel you.
52
It should be thus: You with some guard upon the sudden
53
Break into the princess' chamber; I stay behind,
54
Without the door, through which he needs must pass.
55
Ferneze flies ─ let him. To me he comes; he's kill'd
56
By me ─ observe, by me. You follow; I rail,
57
And seem to save the body. Duchess comes,
58
On whom (respecting her advanced birth,
59
And your fair nature) I know, nay, I do know,
60
No violence must be used. She comes; I storm,
61
I praise, excuse Ferneze, and still maintain
62
The duchess' honor; she for this loves me.
63
I honor you, shall know her soul, you mine;
64
Then naught shall she contrive in vengeance
65
(As women are most thoughtful in revenge)
66
Of her Ferneze, but you shall sooner know't
67
Than she can think't. Thus shall his death come sure;
68
Your duchess brain-caught, so your life secure.

PIETRO.
69
It is too well, my bosom, and my heart!
70
When nothing helps, cut off the rotten part.

Exit.

MENDOZA.
71Who cannot feign friendship can ne'er produce the effects 72of hatred. Honest fool duk, subtle lascivious duchess, seely 73novice Ferneze ─ I do laugh at ye. My brain is in labor till 74it produce mischief; and I feel sudden throes, proofs sensible 75the issue is at hand.
76
As bears shape young, so I'll form my device,
77
Which grown proves horrid: vengeance makes men wise.

Exit.

[I.viii]

Enter Malevole and Passarello.

MALEVOLE.
1Fool, most happily encounter'd. Canst sing, fool?

PASSARELLO.
2Yes, I can sing, fool, if you 'll bear the burden; and I can 3play upon instruments, scurvily, as gentlemen do. O, 4that I had been gelded! I should then have been a fat fool 5for a chamber, a squeaking fool for a tavern, and a private 6fool for all the ladies.

MALEVOLE.
7You are in good case since you came to court, fool. What, 8guarded, guarded!

PASSARELLO.
9Yes, faith, even as footmen and bawds wear velvet, not for 10an ornament of honor, but for a badge of drudgery; for, 11now the duke is discontented, I am fain to fool him asleep 12Every night.

MALEVOLE.
13What are his griefs?

PASSARELLO.
14He hath sore eyes.

MALEVOLE.
15I never observed so much.

PASSARELLO.
16Horrible sore eyes; and so hath every cuckold, for the 17roots of the horns spring in the eyeballs; and that's the 18reason the horn of a cuckold is as tender as his eye, or as 19that growing in the woman's forehead twelve years since 20that could not endure to be touch'd. The duke hangs down 21his head like a columbine.

MALEVOLE.
22Passarello, why do great men beg fools ?

PASSARELLO.
23As the Welshman stole rushes, when there was nothing else 24to filch ─ only to keep begging in fashion.

MALEVOLE.
25Pooh, thou givest no good reason; thou speakest like a fool.

PASSARELLO.
26Faith, I utter small fragments as your knight courts your 27city widow with jingling of his gilt spurs, advancing his 28bush-coloured beard and taking tobacco. This is all the 29mirror of their knightly complements. Nay, I shall talk 30when my tongue is a-going once; 'tis like a citizen on 31horseback, evermore in a false gallop.

MALEVOLE.
32And how doth Maquerelle fare nowadays?

PASSARELLO.
33Faith, I was wont to salute her as our Englishwomen are 34at their first landing in Flushing: I would call her whore. 35But now that antiquity leaves her as an old piece of plastic 36t'work by, I only ask her how her rotten teeth fare every 37morning, and so leave her. She was the first that ever in- 38vented perfum'd smocks for the gentlewomen, and woolen 39shoes for fear of creaking for the visitant. She were an 40excellent lady but that her face peeleth like Muscovy glass.

MALEVOLE.
41And how doth thy old lord, that hath wit enough to be a 42flatterer, and conscience enough to be a knave?

PASSARELLO.
43O, excellent; he keeps beside me fifteen jesters to instruct 44him in the art of fooling, and utters their jests in private 45to the duke and duchess. He'll lie like to your Switzer or 46lawyer; he'll be of any side for most money.

MALEVOLE.
47I am in haste; be brief.

PASSARELLO.
48As your fiddler when he is paid. He'll thrive, I warrant you, 49while your young courtier stands like Good Friday in Lent; 50men long to see it, because more fatting days come after it; 51else he's the leanest and pitifull'st actor in the whole 52pageant. Adieu, Malevole.

MALEVOLE.
53
O world most vile, when thy loose vanities,
54
Taught by this fool, do make the fool seem wise!

PASSARELLO.
55You'll know me again, Malevole.

MALEVOLE.
56O, ay, by that velvet.

PASSARELLO.
57Ay, as a pettifogger by his buckram bag. I am as common 58in the court as an hostess's lips in the country; knights and 59clowns and knaves and all share me; the court cannot 60possibly be without me. Adieu, Malevole.

Exeunt.

[II.i]

61Enter Mendoza, with a sconce, to observe Ferneze's entrance, who, whilst the act is playing, enter unbraced, two Pages before him with lights; is met by Maquerelle and conveyed in. The Pages are sent away.

MENDOZA.
1
He's caught, the woodcock's head is i' th' noose.
2
Now treads Ferneze in dangerous path of lust,
3
Swearing his sense is merely deified.
4
The fool grasps clouds, and shall beget centaurs;
5
And now, in strength of panting, faint delight,
6
The goat bids heaven envy him. ─ Good goose,
7
I can afford thee nothing but the poor comfort of calamity, pity.
8
Lust's like the plummets hanging on clock-lines,
9
Will ne'er ha' done till all is quite undone.
10
Such is the course salt sallow lust doth run,
11
Which thou shalt try. I'll be reveng'd. Duke, thy suspect;
12
Duchess, thy disgrace; Ferneze, thy rivalship ─
13
Shall have swift vengeance. Nothing so holy,
14
No band of nature so strong,
15
No law of friendship so sacred,
16
But I'll profane, burst, violate,
17
'Fore I'll endure disgrace, contempt, and poverty.
18
Shall I, whose very "Hum" struck all heads bare,
19
Whose face made silence, creaking of whose shoe
20
Forc'd the most private passages fly ope,
21
Scrape like a servile dog at some latch'd door?
22
Learn now to make a leg? and cry, "Beseech ye,
23
Pray ye, is such a lord within?"; be aw'd
24
At some odd usher's scoff'd formality?
25
First sear my brains! "Unde cadis, non quo, refert."
26
My heart cries, "Perish all!" How! how! What fate
27
Can once avoid revenge, that's desperate?
28
I'll to the duke. If all should ope ─ If? Tush!
29
Fortune still dotes on those who cannot blush.

Exit.

[II.ii]

Enter Malevole at one door; Biancha, Emilia, and Maquerelle at the other door.

MALEVOLE.
1Bless ye, cast o' ladies! ─ Ha, Dipsas! how dost thou, 2old coal?

MAQUERELLE.
3Old coal!

MALEVOLE.
4Ay, old coal; methinks thou liest like a brand under billets of 5green wood. He that will inflame a young wench's heart, 6let him lay close to her an old coal that hath first been fired, 7a pand'ress, my half-burnt lint, who, though thou canst not 8flame thyself, yet art able to set a thousand virgins' tapers 9afire. ─ (To Biancha.) And how doth Janivere thy husband, 10my little periwinkle? Is he troubled with the cough of the 11lungs still? Does he hawk a-nights still? He will not bite.

BIANCHA.
12No, by my troth, I took him with his mouth empty of old 13teeth.

MALEVOLE.
14And he took thee with thy belly full of young bones. Marry, 15he took his maim by the stroke of his enemy.

BIANCHA.
16And I mine by the stroke of my friend.

MALEVOLE.
17The close stock! O mortal wench! Lady, ha' ye now no 18restoratives for your decayed Jasons? Look ye, crabs' guts 19bak'd, distill'd ox-pith, the pulverized hairs of a lion's 20upper lip, jelly of cock-sparrows, he-monkeys' marrow, or 21pouldre of fox-stones? ─ And whither are all you ambling 22now?

BIANCHA.
23Why, to bed, to bed.

MALEVOLE.
24Do your husbands lie with ye?

BIANCHA.
25That were country fashion, i'faith.

MALEVOLE.
26Ha' ye no foregoers about you? Come, whither in good 27deed, la now?

BIANCHA.
28In good indeed, la now, to eat the most miraculously, 29admirably, astonishable-compos'd posset with three curds, 30without any drink. Will ye help me with a he-fox? ─ Here's 31the duke.

The Ladies go out.

MALEVOLE.
32
(to Biancha).
Fried frogs are very good, and Frenchlike too!

[II.iii]

Enter Duke Pietro, Count Celso, Count Equato, Bilioso, Ferrardo, and Mendoza.

PIETRO.
1The night grows deep and foul. What hour is't?

CELSO.
2Upon the stroke of twelve.

MALEVOLE.
3Save ye, duke!

PIETRO.
4From thee! Begone, I do not love thee! Let me see thee no 5more; we are displeased.

MALEVOLE.
6Why, God be with thee! Heaven hear my curse; May thy 7wife and thee live long together!

PIETRO.
8Begone, sirrah!

MALEVOLE.
9When Arthur first in court began" ─ 10Agamemnon ─ Menelaus ─ was ever any duke a cornuto?

PIETRO.
11Begone, hence!

MALEVOLE.
12What religion wilt thou be of next?

MENDOZA.
13Out with him!

MALEVOLE.
14
With most servile patience time will come
15
When wonder of thy error will strike dumb
16
Thy bezzl'd sense ─
17
Slave's i' favor, ay! Marry, shall he rise?
18
Good God! how subtle hell doth flatter vice,
19
Mounts him aloft and makes him seem to fly,
20
As fowl the tortoise mock'd, who to the sky
21
Th' ambitious shellfish rais'd! Th' end of all
22
Is only that from height he might dead fall.

BILIOSO.
23Why, when? Out, ye rogue! Begone, ye rascal!

MALEVOLE.
24"I shall now leave ye with all my best wishes."

BILIOSO.
25Out, ye cur!

MALEVOLE.
26"Only let's hold together a firm correspondence."

BILIOSO.
27Out!

MALEVOLE.
28"A mutual-friendly-reciprocal-perpetual kind of steady 29unanimous-heartily-leagued ─"

BILIOSO.
30Hence, ye gross-jaw'd, peasantly ─ out, go!

MALEVOLE.
31Adieu, pigeon house; thou burr, that only stickest to 32nappy fortunes. The serpigo, the strangury, an eternal 33uneffectual priapism seize thee!

BILIOSO.
34Out, rogue!

MALEVOLE.
35May'st thou be a notorious wittolly pander to thine own 36wife, and yet get no office, but live to be the utmost misery 37of mankind, a beggarly cuckold!

Exit.

PIETRO.
38It shall be so.

MENDOZA.
39
It must be so, for where great states revenge
40
'Tis requisite the parts which piety
41
And loft respect be closely dogg'd
42
Lay one into his breast shall sleep with him,
43
Feed in the same dish, run in self-faction,
44
Who may discover any shape of danger;
45
For once disgrac'd, displayed in offense,
46
It makes man blushless, and man is (all confess)
47
More prone to vengeance than to gratefulness.
48
Favors are writ in dust, but stripes we feel
49
Depraved nature stamps in lasting steel.

PIETRO.
50You shall be leagued with the duchess.

EQUATO.
51The plot is very good.

MENDOZA.
52
You shall both kill and seem the corse to save.

FERRARDO.
53A most fine brain-trick.

CELSO.
54 (tacite). Of a most cunning knave.

PIETRO.
55
My lords, the heavy action we intend
56
Is death and shame, two of the ugliest shapes
57
That can confound a soul. Think, think of it.
58
I strike, but yet, like him that 'gainst stone walls
59
Directs his shafts, rebounds in his own face;
60
My lady's shame is mine, O God, 'tis mine!
61
Therefore, I do conjure all secrecy;
62
Let it be as very little as may be,
63
Pray ye, as may be.
64
Make frightless entrance, salute her with soft eyes,
65
Stain nought with blood. Only Ferneze dies,
66
But not before her brows. O Gentlemen,
67
God knows I love her! Nothing else, but this:
68
I am not well. If grief, that sucks veins dry,
69
Rivels the skin, casts ashes in men's faces,
70
Bedulls the eye, unstrengthens all the blood,
71
Chance to remove me to another world,
72
As sure I once must die, let him succeed;
73
I have no child; all that my youth begot
74
Hath been your loves, which shall inherit me:
75
Which as it ever shall, I do conjure it,
76
Mendoza may succeed; he's nobly born,
77
With me of much desert.

CELSO.
78 (tacite). Much!

PIETRO.
79
Your silence answers, "Ay,"
80
I thank you. Come on now. O, that I might die
81
Before her shame's display'd! Would I were forc'd
82
To burn my father's tomb, unhele his bones,
83
And dash them in the dirt, rather than this!
84
This both the living and the dead offends:
85
Sharp surgery where naught but death amends.

Exit with the others.

[II.iv]

Enter Maquerelle, Emilia, and Biancha with the posset.

MAQUERELLE.
1Even here it is, three curds in three regions individually 2distinct, most methodically according to art compos'd, 3without any drink.

BIANCHA.
4Without any drink?

MAQUERELLE.
5Upon my honour. Will you sit and eat?

EMILIA.
6Good! The composure, the receipt, how is't?

MAQUERELLE.
7'Tis a pretty pearl; by this pearl (how does't with me?) 8thus it is: seven and thirty yolks of Barbary hens' eggs; 9eighteen spoonfuls and a half of the juice of cook-sparrow 10bones; one ounce, three drams, four scruples, and one 11quarter of the syrup of Ethiopian dates; sweeten'd with 12three-quarters of a pound of pure candied Indian eryngoes; 13strewed over with the powder of pearl of America, amber 14of Cataia, and lamb-stones of Muscovia.

BIANCHA.
15Trust me, the ingredients are very cordial and, no question, 16good, and most powerful in restoration.

MAQUERELLE.
17I know not what you mean by restoration, but this it doth: 18it purifieth the blood, smootheth the skin, enliveneth the 19eye, strength'neth the veins, mundefieth the teeth, com- 20forteth the stomach, fortifieth the back, and quick'neth the 21wit; that's all.

EMILIA.
22By my troth, I have eaten but two spoonfuls, and methinks 23I could discourse most swiftly and wittily already.

MAQUERELLE.
24Have you the art to seem honest?

BIANCHA.
25I thank advice and practice.

MAQUERELLE.
26Why, then, eat me of this posset, quicken your blood, and 27preserve your beauty. Do you know Doctor Plaster-face? 28By this curd, he is the most exquisite in forging of veins, 29spright'ning of eyes, dyeing of hair, sleeking of skins, 30blushing of checks, surfling of breasts, blanching and bleach- 31ing of teeth, that ever made an old lady gracious by 32torchlight; by this curd, la!

BIANCHA.
33Well, we are resolved, what God has given us we'll cherish.

MAQUERELLE.
34Cherish anything saving your husband; keep him not too 35high, lest he leap the pale. But, for your beauty, let it be 36your saint, bequeath two hours to it every morning in 37your closet. I ha' been young, and yet, in my conscience 38I am not above five and twenty; but, believe me, preserve 39and use your beauty; for youth and beauty once gone, we 40are like beehives without honey, out-o'-fashion apparel 41that no man will wear; therefore, use me your beauty.

EMILIA.
42Ay, but men say ─

MAQUERELLE.
43Men say! Let men say what they will. Life o' woman! 44they are ignorant of your wants. The more in years, the 45more in perfection they grow; if they lose youth and 46beauty, they gain wisdom and discretion. But when our 47beauty fades, goodnight with us! There cannot be an 48uglier thing to see than an old woman, from which ─ O 49pruning, pinching, and painting! ─ deliver all sweet 50beauties!

Music within.

BIANCHA.
51Hark! music!

MAQUERELLE.
52Peace, 'tis in the duchess' bedchamber. Good rest, most 53prosperously grac'd ladies.

EMILIA.
54Good night, sentinel.

BIANCHA.
55Night, dear Maquerelle.

Exeunt all but Maquerelle.

MAQUERELLE.
56May my posset's operation send you my wit and honesty; 57and me, your youth and beauty. The pleasing'st rest!

Exit Maquerelle.

[II.v]

A Song (within).
Whilst the song is singing, enter Mendoza with his sword drawn, standing ready to murder Ferneze as he flies from the Duchess' chamber. (Tumult within.)

ALL.
1 (within) Strike, strike!

AURELIA.
2 (within) Save my Ferneze! O, save my Ferneze.

Enter Ferneze in his shirt, and is received upon Mendoza's sword.

ALL.
3 (within) Follow, pursue!

AURELIA.
4 (within) O, save Ferneze!

MENDOZA.
5
Pierce, pierce!
(Thrusts his rapier in Ferneze.)
─ Thou shallow fool, drop there!
6
He that attempts a princess' lawless love
7
Must have broad hands, close heart, with Argus' eyes,
8
And back of Hercules, or else he dies.

Enter Aurelia, Duke Pietro, Ferrardo, Bilioso, Celso, and Equato.

ALL.
9Follow, follow!

(Mendoza bestrides the wounded body of Ferneze and seems to save him.)

MENDOZA.
10
Stand off, forbear, ye most uncivil lords!

PIETRO.
11
Strike!

MENDOZA.
12
Do not; tempt not a man resolved.
13
Would you, inhuman murderers, more than death?

AURELIA.
14
O poor Ferneze!

MENDOZA.
15
Alas, now all defense too late!

AURELIA.
He's dead.

PIETRO.
16
I am sorry for our shame. ─ Go to your bed;
17
Weep not too much, but leave some tears to shed
18
When I am dead.

AURELIA.
19
What, weep for thee? My soul no tears shall find.

PIETRO.
20
Alas, alas, that women's souls are blind!

MENDOZA.
21
Betray such beauty!
22
Murder such youth! Contemn civility!
23
He loves him not that rails not at him.

PIETRO.
24
Thou canst not move us: we have blood enough. ─
25
And please you, lady, we have quite forgot
26
All your defect; if not, why then ─

AURELIA.
Not.

PIETRO.
27
Not! The best of rest; good night.

Exit Pietro with other Courtiers.

AURELIA.
28
Despite go with thee!

MENDOZA.
29
Madam, you ha'done me foul disgrace.
30
You have wrong'd him much, loves you too much.
31
Go to, your soul knows you have.

AURELIA.
32I think I have.

MENDOZA.
33Do you but think so?

AURELIA.
34Nay, sure I have; my eyes have witnessed thy love; thou 35hast stood too firm for me.

MENDOZA.
36
Why, tell me, fair-cheek'd lady, who even in tears
37
Art powerfully beauteous, what unadvised passion
38
Struck ye into such a violent heat against me?
39
Speak, what mischief wrong'd us? What devil injur'd us?
40
Speak.

AURELIA.
41
That thing, ne'er worthy of the name of man, Ferneze.
42
Ferneze swore thou lov'st Emilia;
43
Which to advance, with most reproachful breath
44
Thou both didst blemish and denounce my love.

MENDOZA.
45
Ignoble villain, did I for this bestride
46
Thy wounded limbs? For this, rank opposite
47
Even to my sovereign? For this, O God! for this
48
Sunk all my hopes, and with my hopes my life?
49
Ripp'd bare my throat unto the hangman's ax? ─
50
Thou most dishonor'd trunk! ─ Emilia! ─
51
By life, I know her not ─Emilia ! ─
52
Did you believe him?

AURELIA.
Pardon me, I did.

MENDOZA.
53
Did you? And thereupon you graced him?

AURELIA.
54
I did.

MENDOZA.
55
Took him to favor, nay, even clasp'd with him?

AURELIA.
56
Alas, I did!

MENDOZA.
This night?

AURELIA.
This night.

MENDOZA.
57
And in your lustful twines the duke took you?

AURELIA.
58
A most sad truth.

MENDOZA.
59
O God, O God! How we dull honest souls,
60
Heavy-brain'd men, are swallowed in the bogs
61
Of a deceitful ground, whilst nimble bloods,
62
Light-jointed spirits, pent, cut good men's throats
63
And scape! Alas, I am too honest for this age,
64
Too full of phlegm, and heavy steadiness;
65
Stood still whilst this slave cast a noose about me;
66
Nay, then, to stand in honor of him and her,
67
Who had even slic'd my heart.

AURELIA.
Come, I did err,
68
And am most sorry I did err.

MENDOZA.
69
Why, we are both but dead; the duke hates us.
70
And those whom princes do once groundly hate,
71
Let them provide to die, as sure as fate.
72
Prevention is the heart of policy.

AURELIA.
73
Shall we murder him?

MENDOZA.
74
Instantly.

AURELIA.
75
Instantly, before he casts a plot,
76
Or further blaze my honor's much-known blot,
77
Let's murder him.

MENDOZA.
78
I would do much for you; will ye marry me?

AURELIA.
79
I'll make thee duke. We are of Medicis;
80
Florence our friend; in court my faction
81
Not meanly strengthful; the duke then dead;
82
We well prepar'd for change; the multitude
83
Irresolutely reeling; we in force;
84
Our party seconded; the kingdom maz'd;
85
No doubt of swift success ─ all shall be grac'd.

MENDOZA.
86
You do confirm me; we are resolute,
87
Tomorrow look for change; rest confident.
88
'Tis now about the immodest waist of night;
89
The mother of moist dew with pallid light
90
Spreads gloomy shades about the numbed earth.
91
Sleep, sleep, whilst we contrive our mischief's birth.
92
This man I'll get inhum'd. Farewell; to bed.
93
Ay, kiss the pillow; dream the duke is dead.
94
So, so, good night.
Exit Aurelia.
─ How fortune dotes on imprudence!
95
I am in private the adopted son of yon good prince.
96
I must be duke. Why, if I must, I must!
97
Most seely lord, name me! O heaven!
98
I see God made honest fools to maintain crafty knaves.
99
The duchess is wholly mine too; must kill her husband
100
To quit her shame. Much! Then marry her! Ay!
101
O, I grow proud in prosperous treachery!
102
As wrestlers clip, so I'll embrace you all,
103
Not to support, but to procure your fall.

Enter Malevole.

MALEVOLE.
104God arrest thee!

MENDOZA.
105At whose suit?

MALEVOLE.
106At the devil's. Ah, you treacherous damnable monster! 107How dost? How dost, thou treacherous rogue? Ah, ye 108rascal! I am banish'd the court, sirrah.

MENDOZA.
109Prithee let's be acquainted; I do love thee, faith.

MALEVOLE.
110At your service, by the Lord, la! Shall's go to supper? 111Let's be once drunk together, and so unite a most virtuously 112strengthened friendship. Shall's, Huguenot? Shall's?

MENDOZA.
113Wilt fall upon my chamber tomorrow morn ?

MALEVOLE.
114As a raven to a dunghill. They say there's one dead here, 115prick'd for the pride of the flesh.

MENDOZA.
116Ferneze. There he is; prithee, bury him.

MALEVOLE.
117O, most willingly; I mean to turn pure Rochelle church- 118man, I.

MENDOZA.
119Thou churchman! Why, why?

MALEVOLE.
120Because I'll live lazily, rail upon authority, deny kings' 121supremacy in things indifferent, and be a pope in mine 122own parish.

MENDOZA.
123Wherefore dost thou think churches were made?

MALEVOLE.
124To scour plowshares; I have seen oxen plow up altars; "et 125nunc seges ubi Sion fuit."

MENDOZA.
126Strange!

MALEVOLE.
127Nay, monstrous! I ha' seen a sumptuous steeple turn'd to a 128stinking privy; more beastly, the sacred'st place made a dogs' 129kennel; nay, most inhuman, the stoned coffins of long-dead 130Christians burst up, and made hogs' troughs: "hic finis 131Priami." Shall I ha' some sack and cheese at thy chamber? 132Good night, good mischievous incarnate devil; good night, 133Mendoza. Ah, you inhuman villain, good night! Night, fub.

MENDOZA.
134Good night; tomorrow morn.

Exit Mendoza.

MALEVOLE.
135Ay, I will come, friendly damnation, I will come. I do 136descry cross-points; honesty and courtship straddle as far 137asunder as a true Frenchman's legs.

FERNEZE.
138O!

MALEVOLE.
139Proclamations! More proclamations!

FERNEZE.
140O! a surgeon!

MALEVOLE.
141Hark! lust cries for a surgeon. ─ What news from Limbo? 142How doth the grand cuckold, Lucifer?

FERNEZE.
143O, help! help! Conceal and save me.

Ferneze stirs, and Malevole helps him up and conveys him away.

MALEVOLE.
144
Thy shame more than thy wounds do grieve me far;
145
Thy wounds but leave upon thy flesh some scar,
146
But fame ne'er heals, still rankles worse and worse;
147
Such is of uncontrolled lust the curse.
148
Think what it is in lawless sheets to lie;
149
But, O, Ferneze, what in lust to die!
150
Then thou that shame respects, O, fly converse
151
With women's eyes and lisping wantonness!
152
Stick candles 'gainst a virgin wall's white back:
153
If they not burn, yet at the least they'll black.
154
Come, I'll convey thee to a private port
155
Where thou shalt live, O happy man, from court.
156
The beauty of the day begins to rise,
157
From whose bright form night's heavy shadow flies.
158
Now 'gins close plots to work; the scene grows full,
159
And craves his eyes who hath a solid skull.

Exeunt.

[III.i]

Enter Pietro the Duke, Mendoza, Count Equato, and Bilioso.

PIETRO.
1
'Tis grown to youth of day; how shall we waste this light?
2
My heart's more heavy than a tyrant's crown.
3
Shall we go hunt? Prepare for field.

Exit Equato.

MENDOZA.
4
Would ye could be merry!

PIETRO.
5
Would God I could! Mendoza, bid 'em haste.
Exit Mendoza.
6
I would fain shift place; O vain relief!
7
Sad souls may well change place, but not change grief.
8
As deer, being struck, fly thorough many soils,
9
Yet still the shaft sticks fast, so ─

BILIOSO.
10
A good old simile, my honest lord.

PIETRO.
11
I am not much unlike to some sick man,
12
That long desired hurtful drink; at last
13
Swills in and drinks his last, ending at once
14
Both life and thirst. O, would I ne'er had known
15
My own dishonor! Good God, that men should
16
Desire to search out that which, being found, kills all
17
Their joy of life! To taste the tree of knowledge,
18
And then be driven from out paradise!
19
Canst give me some comfort?

BILIOSO.
20My lord, I have some books which have been dedicated 21to my honor, and I ne'er read'em; and yet they had very 22fine names: Physic for Fortune, Lozenges of Sanctified Sincerity; 23very pretty works of curates, scriveners, and schoolmasters. 24Marry, I remember one Seneca, Lucius Annӕus Seneca ─

PIETRO.
25Out upon him! He writ of temperance and fortitude, yet 26lived like a voluptuous epicure and died like an effeminate 27coward.
28
Haste thee to Florence.
29
Here, take our letters; see'em seal'd; away!
30
Report in private to the honor'd duke
31
His daughter's forc'd disgrace; tell him at length
32
We know too much; due compliments advance.
33
There 's naught that's safe and sweet but ignorance.

Exit Duke.
Enter Biancha.

BILIOSO.
34Madam, I am going ambassador for Florence; 'twill be 35great charges to me.

BIANCHA.
36No matter, my lord, you have the lease of two manors come 37out next Christmas; you may lay your tenants on the 38greater rack for it; and when you come home again, I'll 39teach you how you shall get two hundred pounds a year 40by your teeth.

BILIOSO.
41How, madam?

BIANCHA.
42Cut off so much from housekeeping; that which is saved by 43the teeth, you know is got by the teeth.

BILIOSO.
44'Fore God, and so I may; I am in wondrous credit, lady.

BIANCHA.
45See the use of flattery; I did ever counsel you to flatter 46greatness, and you have profited well. Any man that will do 47so shall be sure to be like your Scotch barnacle, now a 48block, instantly a worm, and presently a great goose: this it 49is to rot and putrefy in the bosom of greatness.

BILIOSO.
50Thou art ever my politician. O, how happy is that old 51lord that bath a politician to his young lady! I'll have fifty 52gentlemen shall attend upon me; marry, the most of them 53shall be farmers' sons because they shall bear their own 54charges, and they shall go appareled thus ─ in sea-water 55green suits, ash-color cloaks, watchet stockings, and 56popinjay-green feathers. Will not the colors do excellent?

BIANCHA.
57Out upon't! They'll look like citizens riding to their friends 58at Whitsuntide, their apparel just so many several parishes.

BILIOSO.
59I'll have it so; and Passarello, my fool, shall go along with 60me; marry, he shall be in velvet.

BIANCHA.
61A fool in velvet?

BILIOSO.
62Ay, 'tis common for your fool to wear satin; I'll have mine 63in velvet.

BIANCHA.
64What will you wear, then, my lord?

BILIOSO.
65Velvet too; marry, it shall be embroidered, because I'll 66differ from the fool somewhat. I am horribly troubled 67with the gout; nothing grieves me but that my doctor hath 68forbidden me wine, and you know your ambassador must 69drink. Didst thou ask thy doctor what was good for the 70gout?

BIANCHA.
71Yes; he said, ease, wine, and women, were good for it.

BILIOSO.
72Nay, thou hast such a wit! What was good to cure it, 73said he ?

BIANCHA.
74Why, the rack. All your empirics could never do the like 75cure upon the gout the rack did in England, or your Scotch 76boot. The French harlequin will instruct you.

BILIOSO.
77Surely, I do wonder, how thou, having for the most part of 78thy lifetime been a country body, shouldest have so good 79a wit.

BIANCHA.
80Who, I? Why, I have been a courtier thrice two months.

BILIOSO.
81So have I this twenty year, and yet there was a gentleman 82usher call'd me coxcomb t'other day, and to my face too. 83Was't not a backbiting rascal? I would I were better 84travel'd, that I might have been better acquainted with the 85fashions of several countrymen; but my secretary, I think, 86he hath sufficiently instructed me.

BIANCHA.
87How, my lord?

BILIOSO.
88"Marry, my good lord," quoth he, your lordship shall 89ever find amongst a hundred Frenchmen forty hot-shots; 90amongst a hundred Spaniards, threescore braggarts; 91amongst a hundred Dutchmen, fourscore drunkards; 92amongst a hundred Englishmen, fourscore and ten madmen; 93and amongst an hundred Welshmen" ─

BIANCHA.
94What, my lord?

BILIOSO.
95"Fourscore and nineteen gentlemen."

BIANCHA.
96But, since you go about a sad embassy, I would have you 97go in black, my lord.

BILIOSO.
98Why, dost think I cannot mourn, unless I wear my hat in 99cypress, like an alderman's heir? That's vile, very old, 100in faith.

BIANCHA.
101I'll learn of you shortly. O, we should have a fine gallant 102of you, should not I instruct you! How will you bear 103yourself when you come into the Duke of Florence' court?

BILIOSO.
104Proud enough, and 'twill do well enough. As I walk up and 105down the chamber, I'll spit frowns about me, have a strong 106perfume in my jerkin, let my beard grow to make me look 107terrible, salute no man beneath the fourth button; and 'twill 108do excellent.

BIANCHA.
109But there is a very beautiful lady there; how will you 110entertain her?

BILIOSO.
111I'll tell you that when the lady hath entertain'd me. 112But to satisfy thee, here comes the fool. Enter Passarello. 113Fool, thou shalt stand for the fair lady.

PASSARELLO.
114Your fool will stand for your lady most willingly and 115most uprightly.

BILIOSO.
116I'll salute her in Latin.

PASSARELLO.
117O, your fool can understand no Latin.

BILIOSO.
118Ay, but your lady can.

PASSARELLO.
119Why, then, if your lady take down your fool, your fool will 120stand no longer for your lady.

BILIOSO.
121A pestilent fool! 'Fore God, I think the world be turn'd 122upside down too.

PASSARELLO.
123O, no, sir; for then your lady and all the ladies in the 124palace should go with their heels upward, and that were a 125strange sight, you know.

BILIOSO.
126There be many will repine at my preferment.

PASSARELLO.
127O, ay, like the envy of an elder sister that hath her younger 128made a lady before her.

BILIOSO.
129The duke is wondrous discontented.

PASSARELLO.
130Ay, and more melancholic than a usurer having all his 131money out at the death of a prince.

BILIOSO.
132Didst thou see Madam Floria today ?

PASSARELLO.
133Yes, I found her repairing her face today. The red upon 134the white showed as if her cheeks should have been served 135in for two dishes of barberries in stewed broth, and the flesh 136to them a woodcock.

BILIOSO.
137A bitter fowl! Come, madam, this night thou shalt enjoy 138me freely, and tomorrow for Florence.

Exeunt Bilioso and Biancha.

PASSARELLO.
139What a natural fool is he that would be a pair of bodies to 140a woman's petticoat, to be truss'd and pointed to them! Well, 141I'll dog my lord; and the word is proper, for, when I fawn 142upon him, he feeds me; when I snap him by the fingers, he 143spits in my mouth. If a dog's death were not strangling, I 144had rather be one than a serving-man; for the corruption 145of coin is either the generation of a usurer or a lousy 146beggar.

Exit.

[III.ii]

Enter Malevole in some frieze gown, whilst Bilioso reads his patent.

MALEVOLE.
1
I cannot sleep; my eyes' ill-neighboring lids
2
Will hold no fellowship. O thou pale, sober night,
3
Thou that in sluggish fumes all sense dost steep;
4
Thou that gives all the world full leave to play,
5
Unbend'st the feebled veins of sweaty labor!
6
The galley-slave, that all the toilsome day
7
Tugs at his oar against the stubborn wave,
8
Straining his rugged veins, snores fast;
9
The stooping scythe-man, that doth barb the field,
10
Thou makest wink sure. In night all creatures sleep;
11
Only the malcontent, that 'gainst his fate
12
Repines and quarrels, alas, he's goodman tell-clock!
13
His sallow jawbones sink with wasting moan;
14
Whilst others' beds are down, his pillow's stone.

BILIOSO.
15Malevole!

MALEVOLE.
16 (to Bilioso) Elder of Israel, thou honest defect of wicked nature and 17obstinate ignorance, when did thy wife let thee lie with 18her?

BILIOSO.
19I am going ambassador to Florence.

MALEVOLE.
20Ambassador! Now, for thy country's honor, prithee, do 21not put up mutton and porridge in thy cloak bag. Thy 22young lady wife goes to Florence with thee too, does she not?

BILIOSO.
23No, I leave her at the palace.

MALEVOLE.
24At the palace! Now discretion shield, man! For God's love, 25let's ha' no more cuckolds! Hymen begins to put off his 26saffron robe; keep thy wife i' the state of grace. Heart o' 27truth, I would sooner leave my lady singled in a bordello 28than in the Genoa palace.
29
Sin, there appearing in her sluttish shape,
30
Would soon grow loathsome, even to blushes' sense;
31
Surfeit would cloak intemperate appetite,
32
Make the soul scent the rotten breath of lust.
33
When in an Italian lascivious palace, a lady guardianless,
34
Left to the push of all allurement,
35
The strongest incitements to immodesty,
36
To have her bound, incens'd with wanton sweets,
37
Her veins fill'd high with heating delicates,
38
Soft rest, sweet music, amorous masquerers,
39
Lascivious banquets, sin itself gilt o'er,
40
Strong fantasy tricking up strange delights,
41
Presenting it dressed pleasingly to sense,
42
Sense leading it unto the soul, confirm'd
43
With potent example, impudent custom,
44
Entic'd by that great bawd, Opportunity ─
45
Thus being prepar'd, clap to her easy ear
46
Youth in good clothes, well-shap'd, rich,
47
Fair-spoken, promising-noble, ardent, blood-full,
48
Witty, flattering ─ Ulysses absent,
49
O Ithaca, can chastest Penelope hold out?

BILIOSO.
50Mass, I'll think on't. Farewell.

MALEVOLE.
51 Exit Bilioso. Farewell.Take thy wife with thee. Farewell.
52
To Florence, um? It may prove good, it may!
53
And we may once unmask our brows.

Enter Count Celso.

[III.iii]

CELSO.
1My honor'd lord ─

MALEVOLE.
2Celso, peace! How is't? Speak low. Pale fears suspect that 3hedges, walls, and trees have ears. Speak; how runs all?

CELSO.
4
I' faith, my lord, that beast with many heads,
5
The staggering multitude, recoils apace.
6
Though thorough great men's envy, most men's malice,
7
Their much intemperate heat hath banish'd you,
8
Yet now they find envy and malice ne'er
9
Produce faint reformation.
10
The duke, the too soft duke, lies as a block,
11
For which two tugging factions seem to saw;
12
But still the iron through the ribs they draw.

MALEVOLE.
13
I tell thee, Celso, I have ever found
14
Thy breast most far from shifting cowardice
15
And fearful baseness; therefore, I'll tell thee, Celso,
16
I find the wind begins to come about;
17
I'll shift my suit of fortune.
18
I know the Florentine, whose only force,
19
By marrying his proud daughter to this prince,
20
Both banish'd me and made this weak lord duke,
21
Will now forsake them all; be sure he will.
22
I'll lie in ambush for conveniency,
23
Upon their severance to confirm myself.

CELSO.
24Is Ferneze interred?

MALEVOLE.
25Of that at leisure; he lives.

CELSO.
26But how stands Mendoza? How is't with him ?

MALEVOLE.
27Faith, like a pair of snuffers, snibs filth in other men and 28retains it in itself.

CELSO.
29He does fly from public notice, methinks, as a hare does 30from hounds; the feet whereon he flies betrays him.

MALEVOLE.
31I can track him, Celso.
32
O, my disguise fools him most powerfully!
33
For that I seem a desperate malcontent,
34
He fain would clasp with me; he is the true slave
35
That will put on the most affected grace
36
For some vile second cause.

Enter Mendoza.

CELSO.
He's here.

MALEVOLE.
Give place. ─
Exit Celso.
37Illo! ho, ho, ho! art there, old truepenny? Where hast thou 38spent thyself this morning? I see flattery in thine eyes and 39damnation in thy soul. Ha, thou huge rascal!

MENDOZA.
40Thou art very merry.

MALEVOLE.
41As a scholar, futuens gratis. How doth the devil go with 42thee now?

MENDOZA.
43Malevole, thou art an arrant knave.

MALEVOLE.
44Who, I? I have been a sergeant, man.

MENDOZA.
45Thou art very poor.

MALEVOLE.
46As Job, an alchemist, or a poet.

MENDOZA.
47The duke hates thee.

MALEVOLE.
48As Irishmen do bum-cracks.

MENDOZA.
49Thou hast lost his amity.

MALEVOLE.
50As pleasing as maids lose their virginity.

MENDOZA.
51Would thou wert of a lusty spirit! Would thou wert noble!

MALEVOLE.
52Why, sure my blood gives me I am noble, sure I am of 53noble kind; for I find myself possessed with all their 54qualities: love dogs, dice, and drabs; scorn wit in stuff- 55clothes; have beat my shoemaker, knock'd my seamstress, 56cuckold' my 'pothecary, and undone my tailor. Noble! 57Why not? Since the stoic said, "Neminem servum non ex 58regibus, neminem regem non ex servis esse oriundum," only busy 59Fortune touses, and the provident Chances blends them 60together. I'll give you a simile. Did you e're see a well with 61two buckets, whilst one comes up full to be emptied, 62another goes down empty to be filled? Such is the state of 63all humanity. Why, look you, I may be the son of some 64duke; for, believe me, intemperate lascivious bastardy 65makes nobility doubtful. I have a lusty, daring heart, 66Mendoza.

MENDOZA.
67Let's grasp; I do like thee infinitely. Wilt enact one thing 68for me?

MALEVOLE.
69Shall I get by it? 70 (Mendoza gives him his purse.) Com- 71mand me; I am thy slave, beyond death and hell.

MENDOZA.
72Murder the duke.

MALEVOLE.
73My heart's wish, my soul's desire, my fantasy's dream, 74my blood's longing, the only height of my hopes! How, O 75God, how? O, how my united spirits throng together! So 76strengthen my resolve!

MENDOZA.
77The duke is now a-hunting.

MALEVOLE.
78Excellent, admirable, as the devil would have it! Lend me, 79lend me rapier, pistol, crossbow; so, so, I'll do it.

MENDOZA.
80Then we agree.

MALEVOLE.
81As Lent and fishmongers. Come, a-cap-a-pe, how? 82Inform.

MENDOZA.
83
Know that this weak-brain'd duke, who only stands
84
On Florence' stilts, hath out of witless zeal
85
Made me his heir, and secretly confirm'd
86
The wreath to me after his life's full point.

MALEVOLE.
87
Upon what merit?

MENDOZA.
Merit! By heaven, I horn him.
88
Only Ferneze's death gave me state's life.
89
Tut, we are politic; he must not live now.

MALEVOLE.
90
No reason, marry. But how must he die now?

MENDOZA.
91My utmost project is to murder the duke, that I might have 92his state, because he makes me his heir; to banish the 93duchess, that I might be rid of a cunning Lacedӕmonian, 94because I know Florence will forsake her; and then to 95marry Maria, the banished Duke Altofront's wife, that 96her friends might strengthen me and my faction; this is 97all, la.

MALEVOLE.
98Do you love Maria?

MENDOZA.
99Faith, no great affection, but as wise men do love great 100women, to ennoble their blood and augment their revenue. 101To accomplish this now, thus now: The Duke is in the 102forest, next the sea; single him, kill him, hurl him in the 103main, and proclaim thou sawest wolves eat him.

MALEVOLE.
104
Um! Not so good. Methinks, when he is slain,
105
To get some hypocrite, some dangerous wretch,
106
That's muffled, o'er with feigned holiness,
107
To swear he heard the duke on some steep cliff
108
Lament his wife's dishonor, and, in an agony
109
Of his heart's torture, hurled his groaning sides
110
Into the swoll'n sea. This circumstance,
111
Well made, sounds probable; and hereupon
112
The duchess ─

MENDOZA.
May well be banished.
113
O unpeerable invention! Rare!
114
Thou god of policy, it honeys me!

MALEVOLE.
115
Then fear not for the wife of Altofront;
116
I'll close to her.

MENDOZA.
117
Thou shalt, thou shalt. Our excellency is pleas'd.
118
Why wert not thou an emperor? When we
119
Are duke, I'll make thee some great man, sure.

MALEVOLE.
120
Nay, make me some rich knave, and I'll make myself
121
Some great man.

MENDOZA.
In thee be all my spirit;
122
Retain ten souls, unite thy virtual powers.
123
Resolve; ha, remember greatness! Heart, farewell.
Enter Celso.
124
The fate of all my hopes in thee doth dwell.

Exit.

MALEVOLE.
125
Celso, didst hear? O heaven, didst hear
126
Such devilish mischief? Sufferest thou the world
127
Carouse damnation even with greedy swallow,
128
And still dost wink, still does thy vengeance slumber?
129
If now thy brows are clear, when will they thunder?

Exeunt.

[III.iv]

Enter Pietro, Ferrardo, Prepasso, and three Pages.

FERRARDO.
1The dogs are at a fault.

Cornets like horns.

PIETRO.
2Would God nothing but the dogs were at it! Let the deer 3pursue safely, the dogs follow the game, and do you follow 4the dogs. As for me, 'tis unfit one beast should hunt another. 5I ha' one chaseth me; and't please you, I would be rid of you 6a little.

FERRARDO.
7Would your grief would as soon leave you as we to quietness.

PIETRO.
8I thank you. ─ Exeunt Ferrardo and Prepasso. 9Boy, what dost thou dream of now?

I PAGE.
10Of a dry summer, my lord; for here's a hot world towards. 11But, my lord, I had a strange dream last night.

PIETRO.
12What strange dream?

I PAGE.
13Why, methought I pleased you with singing, and then I 14dreamt you gave me that short sword.

PIETRO.
15Prettily begg'd; hold thee, I'll prove thy dream true ─ tak't.

I PAGE.
16My duty. But still I dreamt on, my lord; and methought, 17and't shall please your excellency, you would needs out of 18your royal bounty give me that jewel in your hat.

PIETRO.
19O, thou didst but dream, boy; do not believe it. Dreams 20prove not always true; they may hold in a short sword, but 21not in a jewel. But now, sir, you dreamt you had pleased me 22with singing; make that true, as I have made the other.

I PAGE.
23Faith, my lord, I did but dream; and dreams, you say, 24prove not always true; they may hold in a good sword, but 25not in a good song. The truth is, I ha' lost my voice.

PIETRO.
26Lost thy voice! How?

I PAGE.
27With dreaming, faith. But here's a couple of sirenical rascals 28shall enchant ye. What shall they sing, my good lord?

PIETRO.
29Sing of the nature of women, and then the song shall be 30surely full of variety, old crotchets, and most sweet closes; 31it shall be humorous, grave, fantastic, amorous, melancholy, 32sprightly, one in all, and all in one.

I PAGE.
33All in one!

PIETRO.
34By'r Lady too many. Sing! My speech grows culpable of 35unthrifty idleness. Sing!

Song (By 2 and 3 Pages).

[III.v]

Enter Malevole, with crossbow and pistol.

PIETRO.
1Ah, so, so, sing. I am heavy. Walk off; I shall talk in my 2sleep; walk off.

Exeunt Pages.

MALEVOLE.
3Brief, brief! who? The duke! Good heaven, that fools should 4stumble upon greatness! ─ Do not sleep, duke; give ye good 5morrow. You must be brief, duke; I am feed to murder thee. 6Start not! Mendoza, Mendoza hired me; here's his gold, 7his pistol, crossbow, and sword ─ 'tis all as firm as earth. 8O fool, fool, chok'd with the common maze of easy idiots! 9Credulity, make him thine heir! What, thy sworn murderer!

PIETRO.
10O, can it be?

MALEVOLE.
11Can!

PIETRO.
12Discovered he not Ferneze?

MALEVOLE.
13Yes, but why? but why? For love to thee? Much, much! 14To be revenged upon his rival, who had thrust his jaws 15awry; who being slain, supposed by thine own hands, 16defended by his sword, made thee most loathsome, him 17most gracious with thy loose princess; thou, closely yielding 18egress and regress to her, madest him heir whose hot unquiet 19lust straight tous'd thy sheets and now would seize thy state. 20Politician! Wise man! Death! To be led to the stake like a 21bull by the horns; to make even kindness cut a gentle throat! 22Life, why art thou numbed? Thou foggy dullness, speak! 23Lives not more faith in a home-thrusting tongue than in these 24fencing tip-tap courtiers?

Enter Celso, with a hermit's gown and beard.

PIETRO.
25Lord Malevole, if this be true ─

MALEVOLE.
26If! Come, shade thee with this disguise. If! Thou shalt handle 27it; he shall thank thee for killing thyself. Come, follow my 28directions, and thou shalt see strange sleights.

PIETRO.
29World, whither wilt thou?

MALEVOLE.
30
Why, to the devil. Come, the morn grows late.
31
A steady quickness is the soul of state.

Exeunt.

[IV.i]

Enter Maquerelle, knocking at the Ladies' door.

MAQUERELLE.
1Medam, medam, are you stirring, medam? If you be 2stirring, medam, ─ if I thought I should disturb ye ─

Enter Page.

PAGE.
3My lady is up, forsooth.

MAQUERELLE.
4A pretty boy, faith. How old art thou?

PAGE.
5I think fourteen.

MAQUERELLE.
6Nay, and ye be in the teens ─ Are ye a gentleman horn? 7Do you know me? My name is Medam Maquerelle; I lie 8in the old Cunnycourt. ─ See, here the ladies.

Enter Biancha and Emilia.

BIANCHA.
9A fair day to ye, Maquerelle.

EMILIA.
10Is the duchess up yet, sentinel?

MAQUERELLE.
11O ladies, the most abominable mischance! O dear ladies, 12the most piteous disaster! Ferneze was taken last night in 13the duchess' chamber. Alas, the duke catch'd him and 14kill'd him.

BIANCHA.
15Was he found in bed?

MAQUERELLE.
16O, no; but the villainous certainty is, the door was not 17bolted, the tongue-tied hatch held his peace; so the naked 18troth is, he was found in his shirt, whilst I like an arrant 19beast lay in the outward chamber, heard nothing; and yet 20they came by me in the dark, and yet I felt them not, like 21a senseless creature as I was. O beauties, look to your 22busk-points, if not chastely, yet charily: be sure the door 23be bolted. ─ Is your lord gone to Florence?

BIANCHA.
24Yes, Maquerelle.

MAQUERELLE.
25I hope you'll find the discretion to purchase a fresh gown 26fore his return. – Now, by my troth, beauties, I would ha' 27ye once wise. He loves ye; pish! He is witty, bubble! Fair- 28proportioned; meaw! Nobly-born; wind! Let this be still 29your fix'd position: esteem me every man according to his 30good gifts, and so ye shall ever remain most dear and most 31worthy to be most dear ladies.

EMILIA.
32Is the duke return'd from hunting yet?

MAQUERELLE.
33They say not yet.

BIANCHA.
34'Tis now in midst of day.

EMILIA.
35How bears the duchess with this blemish now?

MAQUERELLE.
36Faith, boldly; strongly defies defame, as one that has a 37duke to her father. And there's a note to you: be sure of a 38stout friend in a corner that may always awe your husband. 39Mark the 'haviour of the duchess now; she dares defame; 40cries, "Duke, do what thou canst, I'll quit mine honor." 41Nay, as one confirmed in her own virtue against ten 42thousand mouths that mutter her disgrace, she's presently 43for dances.

Enter Ferrardo.

BIANCHA.
44For dances!

MAQUERELLE.
45Most true.

EMILIA.
46Most strange. 47(aside to Maquerelle.) See, here's my 48 servant, young Ferrard. How many servants think'st thou 49 I have, Maquerelle?

MAQUERELLE.
50(aside to Emilia). The more, the merrier. 'Twas well said, use your servants 51 as you do your smocks; have many, use one, and change 52 often, for that's most sweet and courtlike.

FERRARDO.
53Save ye, fair ladies! Is the duke returned?

BIANCHA.
54Sweet sir, no voice of him as yet in court.

FERRARDO.
55'Tis very strange.

BIANCHA.
56[aside to Maquerelle] And how like you my servant, Maquerelle?

MAQUERELLE.
57[aside to Biancha] I think he could hardly draw Ulysses' bow; but by my 58 fidelity, were his nose narrower, his eyes broader, his hands 59 thinner, his lips thicker, his legs bigger, his feet lesser, his 60 hair blacker, and his teeth whiter, he were a tolerable sweet 61 youth, i'faith. And he will come to my chamber, I will read 62 him the fortune of his beard.

Cornets sound.

FERRARDO.
63Not yet return'd! I fear ─ But the duchess approacheth.

[IV.ii]

Enter Mendoza supporting the Duchess, Guerrino; the ladies that are on the stage rise; Ferrardo ushers in the Duchess, and then takes a Lady to tread a measure.

AURELIA.
1We will dance. Music! We will dance.

GUERRINO.
2Les quanto, lady, Pensez bien, Passa regis, or Biancha's 3Brawl?

AURELIA.
4We have forgot the brawl.

FERRARDO.
5So soon? 'Tis wonder.

GUERRINO.
6Why, 'tis but two singles on the left, two on the right, 7three doubles forward, a traverse of six round; do this 8twice, three singles side, galliard trick-of-twenty, coranto- 9pace; a figure of eight, three singles broken down, come 10up, meet, two doubles, fall back, and then honor.

AURELIA.
11O, Dӕdalus, thy maze! I have quite forgot it.

MAQUERELLE.
12Trust me, so have I, saving the falling back and then honor.

Enter Prepasso.

AURELIA.
13Music, music!

PREPASSO.
14Who saw the duke? The duke?

Enter Equato.

AURELIA.
15Music!

EQUATO.
16The duke? Is the duke returned?

AURELIA.
17Music!

Enter Celso.

CELSO.
18The duke is either quite invisible or else is not.

AURELIA.
19We are not pleased with your intrusion upon our private 20retirement; we are not pleased. You have forgot yourselves.

Enter a Page.

CELSO.
21Boy, thy master? Where's the duke?

PAGE.
22Alas, I left him burying the earth with his spread, joyless 23limbs. He told me, he was heavy, would sleep; bid me walk 24off, for that the strength of fantasy oft made him talk in his 25dreams. I straight obeyed, nor ever saw him since; but 26wheresoe'er he is, he's sad.

AURELIA.
27Music, sound high, as is our heart! Sound high!

[IV.iii]

Enter Malevole, and Pietro disguised like an hermit.

MALEVOLE.
1The duke ─ peace! ─ the duke is dead.

AURELIA.
2Music!

MALEVOLE.
3Is't music?

MENDOZA.
4Give proof.

FERRARDO.
5How?

CELSO.
6Where?

PREPASSO.
7When?

MALEVOLE.
8Rest in peace, as the duke does; quietly sit. For my own 9part, I beheld him but dead; that's all. Marry, here's one 10can give you a more particular account of him.

MENDOZA.
11
Speak, holy father, nor let any brow
12
Within this presence fright thee from the truth.
13
Speak confidently and freely.

AURELIA.
We attend.

PIETRO.
14
Now had the mounting sun's all-ripening wings
15
Swept the cold sweat of night from earth's dank breast,
16
When I, whom men call Hermit of the Rock,
17
Forsook my cell and clamber'd up a cliff,
18
Against whose base the heady Neptune dash'd
19
His high-curl'd brows; there 'twas I eas'd my limbs
20
When, lo, my entrails melted with the moan
21
Someone, who far'bove me was climb'd, did make ─
22
I shall offend ─

MENDOZA.
23
Not.

AURELIA.
24
On.

PIETRO.
25
Methinks I hear him yet: "O female faith!
26
Go sow the ingrateful sand, and love a woman!
27
And do I live to be the scoff of men?
28
To be the wittol-cuckold, even to hug my poison?
29
Thou knowest, O truth,
30
Sooner hard steel will melt with southern wind,
31
A seaman's whistle calm the ocean,
32
A town on fire be extinct with tears,
33
Than women, vow'd to blushless impudence,
34
With sweet behaviour and soft minioning,
35
Will turn from that where appetite is fix'd.
36
O powerful blood! how thou dost slave their soul!
37
I wash'd an Ethiope, who, for recompense,
38
Sullied my name. And must I, then be forc'd
39
To walk, to live thus black? Must! Must! Fie!
40
He that can bare with 'must,' he cannot die."
41
With that he sigh'd so passionately deep
42
That the dull air even groan'd. At last he cries,
43
"Sink shame in seas, sink deep enough!" so dies,
44
For then I view'd his body fall, and souse
45
Into the foamy main. O, then I saw
46
That which methinks I see: it was the duke,
47
Whom straight the nicer-stomach'd sea
48
Belch'd up, but then ─

MALEVOLE.
49
Then came I in; but, 'las, all was too late,
50
For even straight he sunk!

PIETRO.
Such was the duke's sad fate.

CELSO.
51
A better fortune to our Duke Mendoza!

OMNES.
52Mendoza!

Cornets flourish.

MENDOZA.
53
A guard, a guard!
Enter a Guard.
We, full of hearty tears,
54
For our good father's loss ─
55
For so we well may call him
56
Who did beseech your loves for our succession ─
57
Cannot so lightly overjump his death
(To Aurelia.)
As leave his woes revengeless. ─
Woman of shame,
58
We banish thee forever to the place,
59
From whence this good man comes; nor permit,
60
On death, unto the body any ornament;
61
But base, as was thy life, depart away.

AURELIA.
62
Ungrateful!

MENDOZA.
Away!

AURELIA.
Villain, hear me!

Prepasso and Guerrino lead away the Duchess.

MENDOZA.
Begone! ─
63
My lords, address to public council; 'tis most fit
64
The train of Fortune is borne up by wit.
65
Away! Our presence shall be sudden; haste.

All depart saving Mendoza, Malevole, and Pietro.

MALEVOLE.
66
cNow, you egregious devil! Ha, ye murdering politician!
67How dost, duke? How dost look now? Brave duke, i'faith!

MENDOZA.
68How did you kill him?

MALEVOLE.
69Slatted his brains out, then sous'd him in the briny sea.

MENDOZA.
70Brain'd him, and drown'd him too?

MALEVOLE.
71O, 'twas best, sure work; for he that strikes a great man, 72let him strike home, or else 'ware he'll prove no man. 73Shoulder not a huge fellow unless you may be sure to lay 74him in the kennel.

MENDOZA.
75A most sound brainpan! I'll make you both emperors.

MALEVOLE.
76Make us Christians, make us Christians!

MENDOZA.
77I'll hoist ye; ye shall mount.

MALEVOLE.
78To the gallows, say ye? Come! "Prӕmium incertum petit certum 79scelus." How stands the progress?

MENDOZA.
80
Here, take my ring unto the citadel,
81
Have entrance to Maria, the grave duchess
82
Of banish'd Altofront. Tell her we love her;
83
Omit no circumstance to grace our person; do't.

MALEVOLE.
84I'll make an excellent pander. Duke, farewell; 'dieu, 85adieu, duke.

MENDOZA.
86
Take Maquerelle with thee, for 'tis found
87
None cuts a diamond but a diamond.
Exit Malevole.
88
Hermit, thou art a man for me, my confessor.
89
O thou selected spirit, born for my good,
90
Sure thou wouldst make
91
An excellent elder in a deform'd church.
92
Come, we must be inward, thou and I all one.

PIETRO.
93I am glad I was ordained for ye.

MENDOZA.
94Go to, then; thou must know that Malevole is a strange 95villain; dangerous, very dangerous. You see how broad 'a 96speaks; a gross-jaw'd rogue. I would have thee poison him; 97he's like a corn upon my great toe ─ I cannot go for him; 98he must be cored out, he must. Wilt do't, ha?

PIETRO.
99Anything, anything.

MENDOZA.
100
Heart of my life! Thus, then, to the citadel.
101
Thou shalt consort with this Malevole;
102
There being at supper, poison him. It shall be laid
103
Upon Maria, who yields love or dies.
104
Scud quick like lightning!

PIETRO.
105Good deeds crawl, but mischief flies.

Exit Pietro.
Enter Malevole.

MALEVOLE.
106Your devilship's ring has no virtue: the buff-captain, the 107sallow Westphalian gammon-faced zaza, cries, "Stand out! 108Must have a stiffer warrant, or no pass into the Castle of 109Comfort."

MENDOZA.
110Command our sudden letter. ─ Not enter! Sha't! What 111place is there in Genoa but thou shalt? Into my heart, 112into my very heart! Come, let's love; we must love, we two, 113soul and body.

MALEVOLE.
114How didst like the hermit? A strange hermit, sirrah.

MENDOZA.
115A dangerous fellow, very perilous. He must die.

MALEVOLE.
116Ay, he must die.

MENDOZA.
117Thou'st kill him. We are wise; we must be wise.

MALEVOLE.
118And provident.

MENDOZA.
119
Yea, provident. Beware an hypocrite;
120
A churchman once corrupted, O, avoid!
Shoots under his belly.
121
A fellow that makes religion his stalking-horse,
122
He breeds a plague. Thou shalt poison him.

MALEVOLE.
123Ho, 'tis wondrous necessary; how?

MENDOZA.
124
You both go jointly to the citadel;
125
There sup, there poison him; and Maria,
126
Because she is our opposite, shall bear
127
The sad suspect ─ on which she dies or loves us.

MALEVOLE.
128I run.

Exit Malevole.

MENDOZA.
129
We that are great, our sole self-good still moves us.
130
They shall die both, for their deserts craves more
131
Than we can recompense; their presence still
132
Imbraids our fortunes with beholdingness,
133
Which we abhor; like deed, not doer. Then conclude,
134
They live not to cry out, "Ingratitude!"
135
One stick burns t'other; steel cuts steel alone.
136
'Tis good trust few; but, O, 'tis best trust none.

Exit Mendoza.

[IV.iv]

Enter Malevole and Pietro still disguised, at several doors.

MALEVOLE.
1How do you? How dost, duke?

PIETRO.
2O, let the last day fall! Drop, drop on our cursed heads! 3Let heaven unclasp itself, vomit forth flames.

MALEVOLE.
4O, do not rand, do not turn player. There's more of them 5than can well live one by another already. What, art an 6infidel still?

PIETRO.
7I am amaz'd, struck in a swoon with wonder. I am com- 8manded to poison thee.

MALEVOLE.
9I am commanded to poison thee at supper.

PIETRO.
10At supper?

MALEVOLE.
11In the citadel.

PIETRO.
12In the citadel?

MALEVOLE.
13Cross-capers! Tricks! Truth o' heaven! He would discharge 14us as boys do eldern guns, one pellet to strike out another. 15Of what faith art now?

PIETRO.
16All is damnation, wickedness extreme. There is no faith in 17man.

MALEVOLE.
18In none but usurers and brokers; they deceive no man. 19Men take 'em for bloodsuckers, and so they are! Now God 20deliver me from my friends!

PIETRO.
21Thy friends!

MALEVOLE.
22Yes, from my friends, for from mine enemies I'll deliver 23myself. O, cutthroat friendship is the rankest villainy! 24Mark this Mendoza; mark him for a villain; but heaven will 25send a plague upon him for a rogue.

PIETRO.
26O world!

MALEVOLE.
27World! 'Tis the only region of death, the greatest shop of 28the devil, the cruel'st prison of men, out of the which none 29pass without paying their dearest breath for a fee. There's 30nothing perfect in it but extreme, extreme calamity, such 31as comes yonder.

[IV.v]

Enter Aurelia, two Halberds before and two after, supported by Celso and Ferrardo; Aurelia in base mourning attire.

AURELIA.
1
To banishment! Led on to banishment!

PIETRO.
2
Lady, the blessedness of repentance to you!

AURELIA.
3
Why? why? I can desire nothing but death,
4
Nor deserve anything but hell.
5
If heaven should give sufficiency of grace
6
To clear my soul, it would make heaven graceless:
7
My sins would make the stock of mercy poor.
8
O, they would tire heaven's goodness to reclaim them!
9
Judgment is just yet from that vast villain.
10
But, sure, he shall not miss sad punishment
11
'Fore he shall rule. ─ On to my cell of shame.

PIETRO.
12
My cell 'tis, lady, where, instead of masques,
13
Music, tilts, tourneys, and such courtlike shows,
14
The hollow murmur of the checkless winds
15
Shall groan again, whilst the unquiet sea
16
Shakes the whole rock with foamy battery.
17
There usherless the air comes in and out;
18
The rheumy vault will force your eyes to weep,
19
Whilst you behold true desolation.
20
A rocky barrenness shall pierce your eyes,
21
Where all at once one reaches where he stands,
22
With brows the roof, both walls with both his hands.

AURELIA.
23
It is too good. ─ Blessed spirit of my lord,
24
O, in what orb soe'er thy soul is thron'd,
25
Behold me worthily most miserable!
26
O, let the anguish of my contrite spirit
27
Entreat some reconciliation!
28
If not, O, joy, triumph in my just grief!
29
Death is the end of woes and tears' relief.

PIETRO.
30
Belike your lord not lov'd you, was unkind.

AURELIA.
31
O heaven!
32
As the soul lov'd the body, so lov'd he.
33
'Twas death to him to part my presence; heaven,
34
To see me pleased.
35
Yet I, like to a wretch given o'er to hell,
36
Brake all the sacred rites of marriage
37
To clip a base, ungentle faithless villain.
38
O God, a very pagan reprobate ─
39
What should I say? ─ ungrateful, throws me out,
40
For whom I lost soul, body, fame, and honor.
41
But 'tis most fit: why should a better fate
42
Attend on any who forsake chaste sheets,
43
Fly the embrace of a devoted heart,
44
Join'd by a solemn vow 'fore God and man,
45
To taste the brackish blood of beastly lust
46
In an adulterous touch? O ravenous immodesty!
47
Insatiate impudence of appetite!
48
Look, here's your end; for mark, what sap in dust,
49
What sin in good, even so much love in lust.
50
Joy to thy ghost, sweet lord! Pardon to me!

CELSO.
51
'Tis the duke's pleasure this night you rest in court.

AURELIA.
52
Soul, lurk in shades; run, shame, from brightsome skies,
53
In night the blind man misseth not his eyes.

Exit (with Celso, Ferrardo, and Halberds).

MALEVOLE.
54Do not weep, kind cuckold; take comfort, man; thy betters 55have been beccos: Agamemnon, emperor of all the merry 56Greeks, that tickled all the true Trojans, was a cornuto; Prince 57Arthur, that cut off twelve kings' beards, was a cornuto; 58Hercules, whose back bore up heaven, and got forty wenches 59with child in one night ─

PIETRO.
60Nay, 'twas fifty.

MALEVOLE.
61Faith, forty's enow, o'conscience ─ yet was a cornuto. Pa- 62tience; mischief grows proud; be wise.

PIETRO.
63Thou pinchest too deep, art too keen upon me.

MALEVOLE.
64Tut, a pitiful surgeon makes a dangerous sore; I'll tent thee 65to the ground. Thinkest I'll sustain myself by flattering thee 66because thou art a prince? I had rather follow a drunkard, 67and live by licking up his vomit, than by servile flattery.

PIETRO.
68Yet great men ha' done't.

MALEVOLE.
69Great slaves fear better than love, born naturally for a coal 70basket, though the common usher of princes' presence, 71Fortune, hath blindly given them better place. I am vowed 72to be thy affliction.

PIETRO.
73Prithee, be; I love much misery, and be thou son to me.

Enter Bilioso.

MALEVOLE.
74Because you are an usurping duke. ─ (To Bilioso.) Your 75lordship's well return'd from Florence.

BILIOSO.
76Well return'd, I praise my horse.

MALEVOLE.
77What news from the Florentines?

BILIOSO.
78I will conceal the great duke's pleasure; only this was his 79charge: his pleasure is that his daughter die, Duke Pietro 80be banished for banishing his blood's dishonour, and that 81Duke Altofront be reaccepted. This is all. But I hear Duke 82Pietro is dead.

MALEVOLE.
83Ay, and Mendoza is duke. What will you do?

BILIOSO.
84Is Mendoza strongest?

MALEVOLE.
85Yet he is.

BILIOSO.
86Then yet I'll hold with him.

MALEVOLE.
87But if that Altofront should turn straight again?

BILIOSO.
88
Why, then, I would turn straight again.
89
'Tis good run still with him that has most might:
90
I had rather stand with wrong than fall with right.

MALEVOLE.
91What religion will you be of now?

BILIOSO.
92Of the duke's religion, when I know what it is.

MALEVOLE.
93O Hercules!

BILIOSO.
94Hercules? Hercules was the son of Jupiter and Alcmena.

MALEVOLE.
95Your lordship is a very wittol.

BILIOSO.
96Wittol?

MALEVOLE.
97Ay, all-wit.

BILIOSO.
98Amphitryo was a cuckold.

MALEVOLE.
99Your lordship sweats; your young lady will get you a cloth 100for your old worship's brows. Exit Bilioso. 101Here's a fellow to be damned! This is his inviolable maxim: 102Flatter the greatest and oppress the least. A whoreson 103flesh-fly, that still gnaws upon the lean, gall'd backs!

PIETRO.
104Why dost, then, salute him?

MALEVOLE.
105I'faith, as bawds go to church ─ for fashion sake. Come, 106be not confounded; thou art but in danger to lose a duke- 107dom. Think this: this earth is the only grave and Golgotha 108wherein all things that live must rot; 'tis but the draught 109wherein the heavenly bodies discharge their corruption; 110the very muck hill on which the sublunary orbs cast their 111excrements. Man is the slime of this dung pit, and princes 112are the governors of these men; for, for our souls, they are as 113free as emperors, all of one piece; there goes but a pair of 114shears betwixt an emperor and the son of a bagpiper ─ only 115the dyeing, dressing, pressing, glossing makes the difference. 116Now what art thou like to lose? 117A jailer's office to keep men in bonds, 118whilst toil and treason all life's good confounds.

PIETRO.
119
I here renounce forever regency.
120
O Altofront, I wrong thee to supplant thy right,
121
To trip thy heels up with a devilish sleight;
122
For which I now from throne am thrown, world-tricks abjure;
123
For vengeance, though 't comes slow, yet it comes sure.
124
O, I am chang'd. For here, 'fore the dread power,
125
In true contrition I do dedicate
126
My breath to solitary holiness,
127
My lips to prayer, and my breast's care shall be
128
Restoring Altofront to regency.

MALEVOLE.
129
Thy vows are heard, and we accept thy faith.
Undisguiseth himself.
Enter Ferneze and Celso.
130
Banish amazement. Come, we four must stand
131
Full shock of Fortune. Be not so wonder-stricken.

PIETRO.
132
Doth Ferneze live?

FERNEZE.
For your pardon.

PIETRO.
133
Pardon and love. Give leave to recollect
134
My thoughts dispers'd in wild astonishment.
135
My vows stand fix'd in heaven, and from hence
136
I crave all love and pardon.

MALEVOLE.
Who doubts of Providence,
137
That sees this change? A hearty faith to all!
138
He needs must rise who can no lower fall:
139
For still impetuous vicissitude
140
Touseth the world; then let no maze intrude
141
Upon your spirits. Wonder not I rise,
142
For who can sink that close can temporize?
143
The time grows ripe for action. I'll detect
144
My privat'st plot, lest ignorance fear suspect.
145
Let's close to counsel, leave the rest to fate;
146
Mature discretion is the life of state.

Exeunt.

[V.i]

Enter Bilioso and Passarello.

BILIOSO.
1Fool, how dost thou like my calf in a long stocking?

PASSARELLO.
2An excellent calf, my lord.

BILIOSO.
3This calf hath been a reveller this twenty year. When 4Monsieur Gundi lay here ambassador, I could have 5carried a lady up and down at arms' end in a platter; and 6I can tell you, there were those at that time who, to try 7the strength of a man's back and his arm, would be coister'd. 8I have measured calves with most of the palace, and they 9come nothing near me; besides, I think there be not many 10armors in the arsenal will fit me, especially for the headpiece. 11I'll tell thee ─

PASSARELLO.
12What, my lord?

BILIOSO.
13I can eat stew'd broth as it comes seething off the fire, or 14a custard as it comes reeking out of the oven; and I think 15there are not many lords can do it. [Displaying his pomander.] 16A good pomander, a little decayed in the scent, 17but six grains of musk, ground with rosewater, and 18temper'd with a little civet, shall fetch her again presently.

PASSARELLO.
19O, ay, as a bawd with aqua vitae.

BILIOSO.
20And, what, dost thou rail upon the ladies as thou wert 21wont?

PASSARELLO.
22I were better roast a live cat, and might do it with more 23safety. I am as secret to the thieves as their painting. 24There's Maquerelle, oldest bawd and a perpetual beggar. 25Did you never hear of her trick to be known in the city?

BILIOSO.
26Never.

PASSARELLO.
27Why, she gets all the picture-makers to draw her picture; 28when they have done, she most courtly finds fault with them 29one after another, and never fetcheth them. They, in revenge 30of this, execute her in pictures as they do in Germany, and 31hang her in their shops. By this means is she better known to 32the stinkards than if she had been five times carted.

BILIOSO.
33'Fore God, an excellent policy.

PASSARELLO.
34Are there any revels tonight, my lord?

BILIOSO.
35Yes.

PASSARELLO.
36Good, my lord, give me leave to break a fellow's pate 37that hath abused me.

BILIOSO.
38Whose pate?

PASSARELLO.
39Young Ferrard, my lord.

BILIOSO.
40Take heed; he's very valiant. I have known him fight eight 41quarrels in five days, believe it.

PASSARELLO.
42O, is he so great a quarreler? Why then, he's an arrant 43coward.

BILIOSO.
44How prove you that?

PASSARELLO.
45Why, thus: he that quarrels seeks to fight; and he that seeks 46to fight seeks to die; and he that seeks to die seeks never to 47fight more; and he that will quarrel and seeks means never 48to answer a man more, I think he's a coward.

BILIOSO.
49Thou canst prove anything.

PASSARELLO.
50Anything but a rich knave, for I can flatter no man.

BILIOSO.
51Well, be not drunk, good fool. I shall see you anon in the 52presence.

Exeunt.

[V.ii]

Enter Malevole and Maquerelle, at several doors opposite, singing.

MALEVOLE.
1"The Dutchman for a drunkard," ─

MAQUERELLE.
2"The Dane for golden locks," ─

MALEVOLE.
3"The Irishman for usquebaug," ─

MAQUERELLE.
4"The Frenchman for the ( )."

MALEVOLE.
5O, thou art a blessed creature! Had I a modest woman 6to conceal, I would put her to thy custody; for no reasonable 7creature would ever suspect her to be in thy company. 8Ha, thou art a melodious Maquerelle, thou picture of a 9woman, and substance of a beast!

Enter Passarello.

MAQUERELLE.
10O fool, will ye be ready anon to go with me to the revels? 11The hall will be so pester'd anon.

PASSARELLO.
12Ay, as the country is with attorneys.

MALEVOLE.
13What hast thou there, fool?

PASSARELLO.
14Wine. I have learn'd to drink since I went with my lord 15ambassador. I'll drink to the health of Madam Maquerelle.

MALEVOLE.
16Why, thou was wont to rail upon her.

PASSARELLO.
17Ay, but since I borrow'd money of her, I'll drink to her 18health now, as gentlemen visit brokers, or as knights send 19venison to the city, either to take up more money or to 20procure longer forbearance.

MALEVOLE.
21Give me the bowl. I drink a health to Altofront, our 22deposed duke.

Drinks.

PASSARELLO.
23I'll take it. (Drinks.) So! Now I'll begin a health to Madam 24Maquerelle.

Drinks.

MALEVOLE.
25Pugh! I will not pledge her.

PASSARELLO.
26Why, I pleg'd your lord.

MALEVOLE.
27I care not.

PASSARELLO.
28Not pledge Madam Maquerelle! Why, then, will I spew 29up your lord again with this fool's finger.

MALEVOLE.
30Hold; I'll take it.

Drinks.

MAQUERELLE.
31Now thou hast drunk my health, fool, I am friends with 32thee.

PASSARELLO.
33Art? art?
34
When Griffon saw the reconciled quean
35
Offering about his neck her arms to cast,
36
He threw off sword and heart's malignant stream,
37
And lovely her below the loins embrac'd.
38Adieu, Madam Maquerelle.

Exit Passarello.

MALEVOLE.
39And how dost thou think o' this transformation of state now?

MAQUERELLE.
40Verily, very well; for we women always note the falling of 41the one is the rising of the other; some must be fat, some 42must be lean; some must be fools, and some must be lords; 43some must be knaves, and some must be officers; some must 44be beggars, some must be knights; some must be cuckolds, 45and some must be citizens. As for example, I have two court 46dogs, the most fawning curs, the one called Watch, th' 47other Catch. Now I, like lady Fortune, sometimes love 48this dog, sometimes raise that dog, sometimes favor Watch, 49most commonly fancy Catch. Now that dog which I favor I 50feed; and he's so ravenous that what I give he never chaws 51it, gulps it down whole, without any relish of what he has, 52but with a greedy expectation of what he shall have. The 53other dog now ─

MALEVOLE.
54No more dog, sweet Maquerelle, no more dog. And what 55hope hast thou of the Duchess Maria? Will she stoop to 56the duke's lure? Will she come, think'st?

MAQUERELLE.
57Let me see, where's the sign now? Ha' ye e'er a 58calendar? Where's the sign, trow you?

MALEVOLE.
59Sign! Why, is there any moment in that?

MAQUERELLE.
60O, believe me, a most secret power. Look ye, a Chaldean 61or an Assyrian, I am sure 'twas a most sweet Jew, told me, 62court any woman in the right sign, you shall not miss. But 63you must take her in the right vein then, as, when the sign 64is in Pisces, a fishmonger's wife is very sociable; in Cancer, 65a Precisian's wife is very flexible; in Capricorn, a merchant's 66wife hardly holds out; in Libra, a lawyer's wife is very 67tractable, especially if her husband be at the term; only in 68Scorpio 'tis very dangerous meddling. Has the duke sent any 69jewel, any rich stones?

Enter Captain.

MALEVOLE.
70Ay, I think those are the best signs to take a lady in. 71‒By your favor, signior, I must discourse with the Lady 72Maria, Altofront's duchess; I must enter for the duke.

CAPTAIN.
73She here shall give you interview. I received the guardship of 74this citadel from the good Altofront, and for his use I'll 75keep't till I am of no use.

MALEVOLE.
76Wilt thou? O heavens, that a Christian should be found in 77a buff-jerkin! Captain Conscience, I love thee, captain. We 78attend. (Exit Captain.) ─ And what hope hast thou of 79this duchess' easiness?

MAQUERELLE.
80'Twill go hard. She was a cold creature ever; she hated mon- 81keys, fools, jesters, and gentlemen ushers extremely; she 82had the vile trick on't, not only to be truly modestly honor- 83able in her own conscience, but she would avoid the least 84wanton carriage that might incur suspect, as, God bless me, 85she had almost brought bed-pressing out of fashion. I could 86scarce get a fine for the lease of a lady's favor once in a 87fortnight.

MALEVOLE.
88Now, in the name of immodesty, how many maidenheads 89hast thou brought to the block?

MAQUERELLE.
90Let me see. Heaven forgive us our misdeeds! ─ Here's the 91duchess.

[V.iii]

Enter Maria and Captain.

MALEVOLE.
1God bless thee, lady!

MARIA.
2Out of thy company!

MALEVOLE.
3We have brought thee tender of a husband.

MARIA.
4I hope I have one already.

MAQUERELLE.
5Nay, by mine honor, madam, as good ha' ne'er a husband 6as a banish'd husband; he's in another world now. I'll 7tell ye, lady, I have heard of a sect that maintained, when 8the husband was asleep, the wife might lawfully entertain 9another man, for then her husband was as dead ─ much 10more when he is banished!

MARIA.
11Unhonest creature!

MAQUERELLE.
12Pish, honesty is but an art to seem so. Pray ye, what's 13honesty, what's constancy, but fables feigned, odd old fools' 14chat, devised by jealous fools to wrong our liberty?

MALEVOLE.
15Mully, he that loves thee is a duke, Mendoza. He will 16maintain thee royally, love thee ardently, defend thee power- 17fully, marry thee sumptuously, and keep thee in despite of 18Rosicleer or Donzel del Phoebo. There's jewels. 19 (Gives jewels) If thou wilt, so; if not, so.

MARIA.
20
Captain, for God's sake, save poor wretchedness
21
From tyranny of lustful insolence!
22
Enforce me in the deepest dungeon dwell,
23
Rather than here; here round about is hell. ─
24
O my dear'st Altofront, where'er thou breathe,
25
Let my soul sink into the shades beneath,
26
Before I stain thine honor! This thou hast,
27
And, long as I can die, I will live chaste.

MALEVOLE.
28
'Gainst him that can enforce, how vain is strife!

MARIA.
29
She that can be enforc'd has ne'er a knife;
30
She that through force her limbs with lust enrolls,
31
Wants Cleopatra's asps and Portia's coals.
32
God amend you!

Exit with Captain.

MALEVOLE.
33Now, the fear of the devil forever go with thee! ─ Maquer- 34elle, I tell thee, I have found an honest woman. Faith, I per- 35ceive, when all is done, there is of women, as of all other 36things, some good, most bad; some saints, some sinners. 37For as nowadays no courtier but has his mistress, no captain 38but has his cockatrice, no cuckold but has his horns, and 39no fool but has his feather, even so, no woman but has her 40weakness and feather too, no sex but has his ─ I can hunt 41the letter no farther. 42(aside.) O God, how loathsome this 43 toying is to me! That a duke should be forc'd to fool it! 44 Well, "Stultorum plena sunt omnia": better play the fool lord 45 than be the fool lord. ─ Now, where's your sleights, Madam 46Maquerelle?

MAQUERELLE.
47Why, are ye ignorant that 'tis said a squeamish. affected 48niceness is natural to women, and that the excuse of their 49yielding is only, forsooth, the difficult obtaining? You 50must put her to't. Women are flax, and will fire in a 51moment.

MALEVOLE.
52Why, was the flax put into thy mouth, and yet thou ─ thou 53set fire, thou inflame her?

MAQUERELLE.
54Marry, but I'll tell ye now, you were too hot.

MALEVOLE.
55The fitter to have inflamed the flaxwoman.

MAQUERELLE.
56You were too boisterous, spleeny, for, indeed ─

MALEVOLE.
57Go, go, thou art a weak pand'ress; now I see,
58
Sooner earth's fire heaven itself shall waste
59
Than all with heat can melt a mind that's chaste.
60Go thou, the duke's lime-twig! I'll make the duke turn thee 61out of thine office. What, not get one touch of hope, and had 62her at such advantage!

MAQUERELLE.
63Now, o' my conscience, now I think in my discretion, we 64did not take her in the right sign; the blood was not in the 65true vein, sure.

Exit.
Enter Bilioso.

BILIOSO.
66Make way there! The duke returns from the enthronement. 67─ Malevole ─

MALEVOLE.
68Out, rogue!

BILIOSO.
69Malevole ─

MALEVOLE.
70"Hence, ye gross-jaw'd, peasantly ─ out, go!"

BILIOSO.
71Nay, sweet Malevole, since my return, I hear you are 72become the thing I always prophesied would be ─ an 73advanced virtue, a worthily-employed faithfulness, a man 74o' grace, dear friend. Come; what ! "Si quoties peccant 75homines" ─ if as often as courtiers play the knaves, honest 76men should be angry ─ why, look ye, we must collogue 77sometimes, forswear sometimes.

MALEVOLE.
78Be damn'd sometimes.

BILIOSO.
79Right! "Nemo omnibus horis sapit": No man can be honest 80at all hours; necessity often depraves virtue.

MALEVOLE.
81I will commend thee to the duke.

BILIOSO.
82Do let us be friends, man.

MALEVOLE.
83And knaves, man.

BILIOSO.
84Right! Let us prosper and purchase; our lordships shall 85live, and our knavery be forgotten.

MALEVOLE.
86He that by any ways gets riches, his means never shames 87him.

BILIOSO.
88True.

MALEVOLE.
89For impudency and faithlessness are the main stays to 90greatness.

BILIOSO.
91By the Lord, thou art a profound lad.

MALEVOLE.
92By the Lord, thou art a perfect knave. Out, ye ancient 93damnation!

BILIOSO.
94Peace, peace! And thou wilt not be a friend to me as I am 95a knave, be not a knave to me as I am thy friend, and 96disclose me. Peace! Cornets!

[V.iv]

Enter Prepasso and Ferrardo, two Pages with lights, Celso and Equato, Mendoza in duke's robes, and Guerrino.

MENDOZA.
1On, on; leave us, leave us. Exeunt all saving Malevole (and Mendoza). 2Stay, where is the hermit?

MALEVOLE.
3With Duke Pietro, with Duke Pietro.

MENDOZA.
4Is he dead? Is he poisoned?

MALEVOLE.
5Dead, as the duke is.

MENDOZA.
6Good, excellent. He will not blab; secureness lives in 7secrecy. Come hither, come hither.

MALEVOLE.
8Thou hast a certain strong villainous scent about thee my 9nature cannot endure.

MENDOZA.
10Scent, man? What returns Maria, what answer to our 11suit?

MALEVOLE.
12Cold, frosty; she is obstinate.

MENDOZA.
13
Then she's but dead; 'tis resolute, she dies.
14
Black deed only through black deed safely flies.

MALEVOLE.
15Pugh! "Per scelera semper sceleribus tutum est iter."

MENDOZA.
16What, art a scholar? Art a politician? Sure, thou art an 17arrant knave.

MALEVOLE.
18Who, I? I have been twice an undersheriff, man. Well, I 19will go rail upon some great man, that I may purchase the 20bastinado, or else go marry some rich Genoan lady and 21instantly go travel.

MENDOZA.
22Travel, when thou art married?

MALEVOLE.
23Ay, 'tis your young lord's fashion to do so, though he was 24so lazy, being a bachelor, that he would never travel so 25far as the university; yet, when he married her, tails off, and 26─ catzo! ─ for England!

MENDOZA.
27And why for England?

MALEVOLE.
28Because there is no brothel houses there.

MENDOZA.
29Nor courtesans?

MALEVOLE.
30Neither; your whore went down with the stews, and your 31punk came up with your Puritan.

MENDOZA.
32Canst thou empoison? Canst thou empoison?

MALEVOLE.
33Excellently; no Jew, 'pothecary, or politician better. 34Look ye, here's a box. Whom wouldst thou empoison? 35Here's a box, (giving it) which, opened and the fume taken 36up in conduits thorough which the brain purges itself, 37doth instantly for twelve hours' space bind up all show of (giving it) life in a deep senseless sleep. Here's another 38which, being opened under the sleeper's nose, chokes all 39the power of life, kills him suddenly.

MENDOZA.
40I'll try experiments; 'tis good not to be deceived. ─ So, so; 41catzo!
Seems to poison Malevole, (who falls).
42
Who would fear that may destroy?
43
Death hath no teeth or tongue;
44
And he that's great, to him are slaves
45
Shame, murder, fame, and wrong. ─
46Celso!

Enter Celso.

CELSO.
47My honored lord?

MENDOZA.
48The good Malevole, that plain-tongued man, alas, is dead 49on sudden, wondrous strangely! He held in our esteem 50good place. Celso, see him buried, see him buried.

CELSO.
51I shall observe ye.

MENDOZA.
52
And, Celso, prithee, let it be thy care tonight
53
To have some pretty show, to solemnize
54
Our high installment ─ some music, masquery.
55
We'll give fair entertain unto Maria,
56
The duchess to the banish'd Altofront.
57
Thou shalt conduct her from the citadel
58
Unto the palace. Think on some masquery.

CELSO.
59Of what shape, sweet lord?

MENDOZA.
60
Why shape? Why, any quick-done fiction,
61
As some brave spirits of the Genoan dukes
62
To come out of Elysium, forsooth,
63
Led in by Mercury, to gratulate
64
Our happy fortune; some such anything,
65
Some far-fet trick, good for ladies, some stale toy
66
Or other, no matter, so't be of our devising.
67
Do thou prepare't; 'tis but for fashion sake.
68
Fear not; it shall be grac'd, man; it shall take.

CELSO.
69All service.

MENDOZA.
70
All thanks; our hand shall not be close to thee; farewell. ─
71
(aside.)
Now is my treachery secure, nor can we fall.
72
Mischief that prospers, men do virtue call.
73
I'll trust no man; he that by tricks gets wreaths
74
Keeps them with steel; no man securely breathes
75
Out of deserved ranks; the crowd will mutter, "Fool!"
76
Who cannot bear with spite, he cannot rule.
77
The chiefest secret for a man of state
78
Is to live senseless of a strengthless hate.

Exit Mendoza.

MALEVOLE.
79 (starts up and speaks). Death of the damn'd thief! I'll make one i' the masque; thou 80shalt ha' some brave spirits of the antique dukes!

CELSO.
81My lord, what strange delusion?

MALEVOLE.
82Most happy, dear Celso, poison'd with an empty box! 83I'll give thee all anon. My lady comes to court; there is a 84whirl of fate comes tumbling on; the castle's captain 85stands for me, the people pray for me, and the great Leader 86of the just stands for me. Then courage, Celso! 87For no disastrous chance can ever move him 88That leaveth nothing but a God above him.

Exeunt.

[V.v]

Enter Prepasso and Bilioso, two Pages before them; Maquerelle, Biancha, and Emilia.

BILIOSO.
1Make room there, room for the ladies! Why, gentlemen, 2will not ye suffer the ladies to be enter'd in the great 3chamber? Why, gallants! And you, sir, to drop your torch where 4the beauties must sit too.

PREPASSO.
5And there's a great fellow plays the knave; why dost not 6strike him?

BILIOSO.
7Let him play the knave o' God's name; think'st thou I 8have no more wit than to strike a great fellow? ─ The 9music! More lights! Revelling-scaffolds! Do you hear? 10Let there be oaths enow ready at the door; swear out the 11devil himself. Let's leave the ladies and go see if the lords 12be ready for them.

All save the Ladies depart.

MAQUERELLE.
13And, by my troth, beauties, why do you not put you into the 14fashion? This is a stale cut; you must come in fashion. Look 15ye, you must be all felt, felt and feather, a felt upon your 16bare hair. Look ye, these tiring things are justly out of 17request now. And, do ye hear, you must wear falling 18bands, you must come into the falling fashion; there is such 19a deal o' pinning these ruffs, when the fine clean fall is 20worth all; and again, if you should chance to take a nap in 21the afternoon, your falling band requires no poting stick to 22recover his form. Believe me, no fashion to the falling, I say.

BIANCHA.
23And is not Signior St. Andrew a gallant fellow now?

MAQUERELLE.
24By my maidenhead, la, honour and he agrees as well together 25as a satin suit and woollen stockings.

EMILIA.
26But is not Marshall Make-room, my servant in reversion, 27a proper gentleman?

MAQUERELLE.
28Yes, in reversion, as he had his office; as, in truth, he hath 29all things in reversion: he has his mistress in reversion, his 30clothes in reversion, his wit in reversion, and, indeed, is a 31suitor to me for my dog in reversion. But, in good verity, la, 32he is as proper a gentleman in reversion as ─ and, indeed, 33as fine a man as may be, having a red beard and a pair of 34warp'd legs.

BIANCHA.
35But i'faith, I am most monstrously in love with Count 36Quidlibet-in-Quodlibet. Is he not a pretty, dapper, unidle 37gallant?

MAQUERELLE.
38He is even one of the most busy-fingered lords; he will put 39the beauties to the squeak most hideously.

Re-enter Bilioso.

BILIOSO.
40Room! Make a lane there! The duke is ent'ring. Stand 41handsomely, for beauty's sake; take up the ladies there! So, 42cornets, cornets!

[V.vi]

Enter Prepasso, joins to Bilioso; two Pages and lights, Ferrardo, Mendoza. At the other door, two Pages with lights, and the Captain leading in Maria. The Duke meets Maria and closeth with her; the rest fall back.

MENDOZA.
1
Madam, with gentle ear receive my suit;
2
A kingdom's safety should o'erpoise slight rites;
3
Marriage is merely nature's policy.
4
Then since, unless our royal beds be join'd,
5
Danger and civil tumult frights the state,
6
Be wise as you are fair, give way to fate.

MARIA.
7
What wouldst thou, thou affliction to our house?
8
Thou ever devil, 'twas thou that banishedst
9
My truly noble lord.

MENDOZA.
10
I!

MARIA.
11
Ay, by thy plots, by thy black stratagems.
12
Twelve moons have suffer'd change since I beheld
13
The loved presence of my dearest lord.
14
O thou far worse than Death! He parts but soul
15
From a weak body; but thou soul from soul
16
Disseverest, that which God's own hand did knit;
17
Thou scant of honor, full of devilish wit!

MENDOZA.
18
We'll check your too intemperate lavishness.
19
I can and will!

MARIA.
20
What canst?

MENDOZA.
21
Go to; in banishment thy husband dies.

MARIA.
22
He ever is at home that's ever wise.

MENDOZA.
23
You'st never meet more; reason should love control.

MARIA.
24
Not meet!
25
She that dear loves, her love's still in her soul.

MENDOZA.
26
You are but a woman, lady; you must yield.

MARIA.
27
O, save me, thou innated bashfulness,
28
Thou only ornament of woman's modesty!

MENDOZA.
29
Modesty! Death, I'll torment thee.

MARIA.
30
Do, urge all torments, all afflictions try;
31
I'll die my lord's as long as I can die.

MENDOZA.
32
Thou obstinate, thou shalt die. ─ Captain, that lady's life
33
Is forfeited to justice. We have examined her,
34
And we do find she hath empoisoned
35
The reverend hermit; therefore, we command
36
Severest custody. ─ Nay, if you'll do's no good,
37
You'st do's no harm. A tyrant's peace is blood.

MARIA.
38
O, thou art merciful! O gracious devil,
39
Rather by much let me condemned be
40
For seeming murder than be damn'd for thee!
41
I'll mourn no more; come, girt my brows with flowers;
42
Revel and dance, soul, now thy wish thou hast;
43
Die like a bride; poor heart, thou shalt die chaste.

Enter Aurelia in mourning habit.

AURELIA.
44
"Life is a frost of cold felicity,
45
And death the thaw of all our vanity."
46
Was't not an honest priest that wrote so?

MENDOZA.
47
Who let her in?

BILIOSO.
Forbear!

PREPASSO.
Forbear!

AURELIA.
48
Alas, calamity is everywhere.
49
Sad misery, despite your double doors,
50
Will enter even in court.

BILIOSO.
51
Peace!

AURELIA.
52
I ha' done. One word ─ take heed! I ha' done.

Enter Mercury with loud music.

MERCURY.
53
Cyllenian Mercury, the god of ghosts,
54
From gloomy shades that spread the lower coasts,
55
Calls four high-famed Genoan dukes to come
56
And make this presence their Elysium,
57
To pass away this high triumphal night
58
With song and dances, court's more soft delight.

AURELIA.
59Are you god of ghosts? I have a suit depending in hell 60betwixt me and my conscience; I would fain have thee help 61me to an advocate.

BILIOSO.
62Mercury shall be your lawyer, lady.

AURELIA.
63Nay, faith, Mercury has too good a face to be a right 64lawyer.

PREPASSO.
65Peace, forbear! Mercury presents the masque.

Cornets: The song to the cornets, which playing, the masque enters; Malevole, Pietro, Ferneze, and Celso in white robes, with duke's crowns upon laurel wreaths, pistolets and short swords under their robes.

MENDOZA.
66
Celso, Celso, court Maria for our love.
67
─ Lady, be gracious, yet grace.

Malevole takes his Wife to dance.

MARIA.
68
With me, sir?

MALEVOLE.
Yes, more loved than my breath;
69
With you I'll dance.

MARIA.
Why, then, you dance with death.
70
But, come, sir, I was ne'er more apt to mirth.
71
Death gives eternity a glorious breath;
72
O, to die honor'd, who would fear to die?

MALEVOLE.
73
They die in fear who live in villainy.

MENDOZA.
74
Yes, believe him, lady, and be rul'd by him.

PIETRO.
75
Madam, with me?

Pietro takes his wife Aurelia to dance.

AURELIA.
Wouldst then be miserable?

PIETRO.
76
I need not wish.

AURELIA.
77
O, yet forbear my hand! Away, fly, fly!
78
O, seek not her that only seeks to die!

PIETRO.
79
Poor loved soul!

AURELIA.
What, wouldst court misery?

PIETRO.
80
Yes.

AURELIA.
She'll come too soon. ─ O my griev'd heart!

PIETRO.
81
Lady, ha' done, ha' done.
82
Come, let's dance; be once from sorrow free.

AURELIA.
83
Art a sad man?

PIETRO.
Yes, sweet.

AURELIA.
Then we'll agree.

Ferneze takes Maquerelle; and Celso, Biancha; then the cornets sound the measure, one change and rest.

FERNEZE.
84 (to Biancha). Believe it, lady: shall I swear? Let me enjoy you in private, 85and I'll marry you, by my soul.

BIANCHA.
86I had rather you would swear by your body; I think that 87would prove the more regarded oath with you.

FERNEZE.
88I'll swear by them both, to please you.

BIANCHA.
89O, damn them not both to please me, for God's sake!

FERNEZE.
90Faith, sweet creature, let me enjoy you tonight, and I'll 91marry you tomorrow fortnight, by my troth, la.

MAQUERELLE.
92On his troth, la! Believe him not; that kind of cony-catching 93is as stale as Sir Oliver Anchovy's perfum'd jerkin. Promise 94of matrimony by a young gallant, to bring a virgin lady into 95a fool's paradise, make her a great woman, and then cast 96her off ─ 'tis as common, as natural to a courtier, as jealousy 97to a citizen, gluttony to a Puritan, wisdom to an alderman, 98pride to a tailor, or an empty hand basket to one of these 99sixpenny damnations. Of his troth, la! Believe him not; 100traps to catch polecats!

MALEVOLE.
101
(to Maria).
Keep your face constant; let no sudden passion
102
Speak in your eyes.

Reveals himself.

MARIA.
O my Altofront!

PIETRO.
(to Aurelia).
A tyrant's jealousies
103
Are very nimble; you receive it all.

Reveals himself.

AURELIA.
104 (Aurelia to Pietro). My heart, though not my knees, doth humbly fall 105low as the earth, to thee.

PIETRO.
106Peace! Next change; no words.

MARIA.
107Speech to such, ay, O, what will affords!

Cornets sound the measure over again; which danced, they unmask.

MENDOZA.
108Malevole!

They environ Mendoza, bending their pistols on him

MALEVOLE.
109No!

MENDOZA.
110Altofront! Duke Pietro! Ferneze! Ha!

ALL.
111Duke Altofront! Duke Altofront!

Cornets, a flourish.

MENDOZA.
112
Are we surpris'd? What strange delusions mock
113
Our senses? Do I dream? or have I dreamt
114
This two days' space? Where am I?

They seize upon Mendoza.

MALEVOLE.
115
Where an archvillain is.

MENDOZA.
116
O, lend me breath till I am fit to die!
117
For peace with heaven, for your own souls' sake,
118
Vouchsafe me life!

PIETRO.
119
Ignoble villain, whom neither heaven nor hell,
120
Goodness of God or man, could once make good!

MALEVOLE.
121
Base, treacherous wretch, what grace canst thou expect,
122
That hast grown impudent in gracelessness?

MENDOZA.
123
O, life!

MALEVOLE.
124
Slave, take thy life.
125
Wert thou defensed, through blood and wounds,
126
The sternest horror of a civil fight
127
Would I achieve thee: but, prostrate at my feet
128
I scorn to hurt thee: 'Tis the heart of slaves
129
That deigns to triumph over peasants' graves;
130
For such thou art, since birth doth ne'er enroll
131
A man 'mong monarchs, but a glorious soul.
132
O, I have seen strange accidents of state!
133
The flatterer, like the ivy, clip the oak
134
And waste it to the heart; lust so confirm'd
135
That the black act of sin itself not sham'd
136
To be term'd courtship.
137
O, they that are as great as be their sins,
138
Let them remember that th' inconstant people
139
Love many princes merely for their faces
140
And outward shows; and they do covet more
141
To have a sight of these than of their virtues.
142
Yet thus much let the great ones still conceive:
143
When they observe not heaven's impos'd conditions,
144
They are no kings, but forfeit their commissions.

MAQUERELLE.
145O good my lord, I have lived in the court this twenty year; 146they that have been old courtiers and come to live in the city, 147they are spited at and thrust to the walls like apricocks, good 148my lord.

BILIOSO.
149My lord, I did know your lordship in this disguise; you heard 150me ever say, if Altofront did return, I would stand for him. 151Besides, 'twas your lordship's pleasure to call me wittol and 152cuckold; you must not think, but that I knew you, I would 153have put it up so patiently.

MALEVOLE.
154
(To Pietro and Aurelia.)
You o'erjoyed spirits, wipe your long-wet, eyes.
155
Hence with this man!
(Kicks out Mendoza.)
An eagle takes not flies. ─
156
(To Pietro and Aurelia.)
You to your vows. ─
(To Maquerelle.)
And thou unto the suburbs. ─
157
(To Bilioso.)
You to my worst friend I would hardly give:
158
Thou art a perfect old knave. ─
(To Celso and the Captain.)
All-pleased, live
159
You two unto my breast.
(To Maria.)
─ Thou to my heart.
160
The rest of idle actors idly part;
161
And as for me, I here assume my right,
162
To which I hope all's pleas'd. To all, good night.

Cornets, a flourish. Exeunt omnes.
FINIS

Epilogus

1
Your modest silence, full of heedy stillness,
2
Makes me thus speak: a voluntary illness
3
Is merely senseless; but unwilling error,
4
Such as proceeds from too rash youthful fervor,
5
May well be call'd a fault, but not a sin.
6
Rivers take names from founts where they begin.
7
Then let not too severe an eye peruse
8
The slighter brakes of our reformed Muse,
9
Who could herself herself of faults detect,
10
But that she knows 'tis easy to correct,
11
Though some men's labor. Troth, to err is fit,
12
As long as wisdom's not profess'd, but wit.
13
Then till another's happier Muse appears,
14
Till his Thalia feast your learned ears,
15
To whose desertful lamps pleas'd Fates impart
16
Art above Nature, Judgment above Art.
17
Receive this piece, which hope nor fear yet daunteth:
18
He that knows most, knows most how much he wanteth.

FINIS